Stress Management Magic

Welcome to the tedious and distracting overload provided by technology.  Some refer to it as the “Attention Crisis”.

Technology has provided us with some awesome things – a plethora of websites to get information from, emails, blogs, YouTube videos, music, current news (past news too), the weather, and a never-ending line of opinions, photos, movies and games.  This is NOT a complete list.

You may be literally fatigued from it all.  You may find your nerves are shredded by all the stimuli, and the things you feel you must check out in a day’s time.

For all the wonderful things available you may find you are squandering your time and lower your productivity.  Keep in mind many of the above mentioned things should be done in your “free” time – excluding, of course, the family, school, your workload, aging parents, and the myriad of other demands in this twenty-first century living.

All Americans are vulnerable to finding themselves more stressed out than ever and really overwhelmed with it all.  You may be facing the limit of your human ability to cope with all the stimuli in your environment

With this entire happening, what may be worse is you find your coping mechanisms are becoming less effective, and your stress level increasing.  No matter how you multitask, your list just seems to grow.

By the end of each day you may emerge with eyestrain and having accomplished nothing much at all.   You have been distracted by all the “input”, and we haven’t even mentioned continuous advertisements on television, the radio, newspapers and magazines – along with non-stop “hearing distractions, no matter where you are!

SO WHAT CAN YOU DO?

First thing you can do right now is take a minute.  It won’t kill any project you have begun.  You need mindful oxygen. Stress makes you take shallow breaths…withholding your oxygen.  In turn, you are depleted of what you need to manage your life and make good decisions. Take a breath in slowly through the nose.  Now exhale through the mouth.  Do this several times.

Next you need to really pay attention to the “overall picture”.  It will help to prioritize.  Build a list (doesn’t have to be fancy), but make it honest.  What do you really need to do? .  Ask yourself whether you really are focusing on the right things

Study your habits.  Do not be an accepting and passive consumer of everything that is put in front of you. Tame your appetite.  LIMIT YOUR INPUT!  Open-ended cruising of all that is offered WILL cause you ultimately to lose track of your goals, and your time, which is your life!

If you sleep eight hours a night you still have three hundred and fifty thousand waking minutes of each you.  Now compute how many minutes a week you truly spend passively reading and hearing “stuff”?   You can waste so much time following fluff.  How much time do you spend healing you?  How many minutes with the family and loved ones?  How many minutes to breathe and relax?

You want to take down your stress level?  Tame your wild stallion and pick and choose the most wonderful ways to spend your minutes and hours. Laugh with someone, pray with someone, walk alone to the top of a hill and sing.  Hug like it feels inside; shake hands with a hearty and warm grasp. Fly a kite.  Splash around in the small puppy pool with the puppy.  Go outside and get on a bike and ride it.  There isn’t an age limit!

Or if you are actually not supposed to be taking time to read this, then bravo.  You took a minute or two to change your life.

Now take in a deep breath and think:  I feel better. Turn your hands up and exhale through the mouth and SEE your negativity, and any unresolved issues, fly from your head to your arms and out the fingertips.

Are you feeling stressed out?  You can’t imagine it, but stress show on your face!  You don’t want to look like this at work, do you?

Think outside the box! This phrase often refers to novel, creative and smart thinking.

“According to consultants of the 1970s and 1980s tried to make their prospective clients feel inferior by presenting them with the puzzle. The challenge is to connect the dots by drawing four straight, continuous lines that pass through each of the nine dots, and never lifting the pencil from the paper. The puzzle is easily solved but only if you draw the lines outside the confines of the square area defined by the nine dots themselves. Thus, the phrase “thinking outside the box” was born. ”

You’ve gone far enough to look up “stress management” and read this post thus far, now think outside the box and begin to change your life!

Granted for some individuals out of control stress management requires medical help, perhaps anti-depressants, counseling, yoga classes, or general therapy; stress management help from a source that can be your motivator and guide you.  That is fine.  Help is out there!

YOU, however, may be one of the self-motivated individuals who are able to make life changes with just a bit of knowledge and a burning desire to have less stress in your life.  There are plenty of you out there – just too many of you, know you need it, but when it comes down to practice, says:  “I just don’t have time.”

If you IGNORE your stress now it will accelerate with fervor, and sooner or later plow you down like an innocent bystander.  Take action now and save mental and physical woes that will come without you doing anything about managing your stress.

Here are a few simple thoughts to mull over to help get you started.

When you adopt a positive outlook you create a shift in your outlook.  Instead of seeing a set of problems before you, see opportunities and challenges.  Instead of feeling hopeless about any stressful scenario, feel hopeful.  By focusing on the things that do work well, you are inviting more of the same.

Your brain is adaptable.  “Scientists use the term ‘plasticity’ to describe the brain’s ability to adapt.  It’s a simple idea with big implications.  If some brain cells are lost through normal aging, others can often pick up the slack.  Existing connections may be fine-tuned.  The remaining cells also may grow new dendrites-branches that receive messages from other cells.

“The upshot:  Specific areas of your brain may actually grow as a result of particular experiences.  Certain areas may function more efficiently, too.”       (excerpt from Healthy Living)

What this means to you is that you can use almost any stressful experience to grow new brain cells and refine your brain.  The trick is to adapt that positive train of thought and made the problems challenges instead of dreaded problems.

This power is all kick started from within you and if you are tired of the way things are, pull it together and CHANGE YOUR LIFE!

Five Easy ways to get started

1.  Practice mindful breathing.  Not familiar?  Simply put: breathe in through the nose, and exhale through the mouth.

Every time you feel stressors getting the best of you – slow down and breathe.  (For more details on this refer to previous posts – with detailed information)

2.  If you think ANY negative words or feelings, replace them with two positive thoughts.

Example:

I can’t  =  I will,  Ican

I’m miserable = I’m happy, I’m  grateful

no = yes, will do

I’m fearful = I’m brave, I’m empowered

things will never change = this too shall pass, change is a guarantee

Teach your changing brain to respond to life experiences with smart thoughts that blossom into changes for the better.

3.  Don’t take everything so seriously.  The “party” was going before you arrived, and will be here after you leave.  Allow you to have some fun. Prioritize what is REALLY most important.

4. Smile more often.  It doesn’t matter if others do or not.  Smiling actually makes you feel better.  Just do it.  If you smile at someone and they scowl or ignore you then just remember they must be more unhappy than you.  Send them a blessing.You will feel better than if you allowed them to take your happiness away.

5.  Know that no matter how you want to control things – most things are simply out of our control.  The only thing you really have control over is your response to life!  Things usually work out, and sometimes better than you expected initially.

CREATE  a wonderful day and you will change your life and the lives of those in your world.  Pray (and / or meditation) never hurts!

We all face adversity in our life.  It is not the adversity that defines us. It is how we respond to it.  During tough times, do you spend too much time feeling sorry for yourself, or wondering what life is all about?   Think about it honestly.

Step aside from your own self-pity, and worry that accomplishes nothing, and try to find gratitude for moments life presents – small moments of rapture – if you choose to see them.  You will be moving towards a happier and more peaceful life.

Listen to the bird singing a song outside the window in the morning, or the sound of raindrops on the roof that sing a melody of a cool spring rain and be grateful for your ears that hear.

Feel the wisp of a breeze across the face on a hot summer’s day.  Listen to someone laughing.  It will brighten your moment even if you don’t know why they are laughing; be grateful as laughter heals

Be grateful for a body that heals from life’s injuries and sustains itself without much help from you – for decades!    “Learn how to dance in the rain”.

It almost sounds too simple to be important, but one word, “gratitude”, can change your attitude, thus, your life, forever.

“When we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that is present, we experience heaven on earth.”- Sarah Breathnach

When we choose to focus on the positive that still exists all around us, it is magnified in our vision, and these positive and grateful thoughts help manage stress and build peace from within.

Find something to celebrate.  Pet a puppy.  Hug a friend. Be grateful for your mind, an intelligence that allows you to change your thoughts, and change your life!

This post on stress is in the category of “Author Unknown”, but it is so exceptional that it was almost mandatory to post it!  It is witty in places, but also has great wisdom. It is worth a few moments of your time to read.

If you are sincerely searching for management techniques for your stress, take the time to read whatever your hand and mouse take you to on the web.  You’ll know within seconds if it is something that will guide you to better days.  If there is any doubt – read the information again.

Knowledge is power and using that knowledge can change your life!

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“A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, ‘How heavy is this glass of water?’  Answers called out ranged from 20grams to 500 grams.  The lecturer replied,  ‘The absolute weight doesn’t matter.  It depends on how long you try to hold it.  If I hold it for a minute it’s not a problem.  If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my right arm.  If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance.  In each case, it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.’”

“He continued, ‘and that’s the way it is with stress management.  If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, the burden will become increasingly heavy, and we won’t be able to carry on.  As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again.  When you are refreshed, you can carry on with the burden.”

“So before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down:  don’t carry it home.  You can pick it up tomorrow.”

” Whatever burdens you are carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can.  Put down anything that may be a burden to you right now.  Don’t pick it up until after you’ve rested a while.”

“Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life:  Just accept that, some days, you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue.  Always keep your words soft and sweet – just in case you have to eat them. ”

“Always wear something that makes you look good, you might die in it.  Drive with care, it’s not only cars that can be ‘recalled’ by their maker.  If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.”

“It you lend someone twenty dollars and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.  It may be that your single purpose in life is simply to be kind to others.  Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won’t have a leg to stand on.”

“Nobody cares if you can’t dance well, just get up and dance.  Since it’s the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.  When everything is coming your way, you are probably in the wrong lane.  Birthdays are good for you.  The more you have, the longer you live.”

“You may not be the only one person in the world, but you may be the world to one person.  Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.  Others are too disastrous to ever make again. ”

“A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.”

“We could learn a lot from crayons….some are sharp, and some are dull.  Some have pretty colors and all have color of some sort; some have weird names, but they all have to live in the same box.”

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Visualize life getting better…..analyze your thoughts before committing to them……study whatever it takes to manage ongoing stresses of life!  You’ll profit from doing these things – and so will your family and friends, by enjoying a calmer and happier you!

Enjoy your day.  Enjoy the challenges before you, and don’t forget you have a secret weapon to help your relax, regenerate and think more intelligently….USE YOUR OXYGEN MINDFULLY AND OFTEN!

Marsha J. O’Brien

http://www.stressmanagementmagic.com/2010/02/contest-stress-free/

http://www.marshaobrien.wordpress.com

The little things can drive you crazy!

Here is how to manage them effectively.

Below is a partial list of the reality of constant “little irritants”. Recognize any of them?

1. People criticizing and then telling you a better way to do

your jobs, manage your home, or raise your children

2.  Ants in the kitchen

3.  Traffic

4.  Rude people

5.  Dropping something that spills or breaks

6.  Someone who pretends to listen

7.  Being put on hold and then being disconnected

8.  Parents screaming four letter words at their children

9.  The neighbor’s dog barking all day long.

10.  All the cats on the street turning your front porch plants           into urinals.

11.  The sound of the ba-boom coming from speakers in a car three blocks away.

12.  Being told the cost of living hasn’t gone up so there will be no increase for senior citizens.

13.  Looking in your rear view mirror only to find someone riding you so closely if you just took your foot off the gas pedal they would be sitting in your front seat

14.  Sick people coughing and sneezing while they are a work

15.  Not being able to get the lid off of a container or jar

16.  The puppy shredding paper all over the house

17.  Kids yelling

18.  When your entire day changes because of little sequences   of life you didn’t expect

19.  When you are in a hurry and everything and everybody seems to move in slow motion

20    Constipation  (really)

21.  You get to the meeting fifteen minutes early only to   discover that it started fifteen minutes earlier than your arrival

…..and the list goes on and on and on – day after day after day!

You probably can add fifty things to the list that haven’t been mentioned.  So WHY do these things irritate you?  After all, they aren’t life threatening; they are just bothersome.

The incident isn’t the biggest problem, but just the trigger for an overload of stress and a possible explosion of emotion!  The idiom “the straw that broke the camel’s back” is an old Arab proverb.   It refers to a camel loaded beyond it’s capacity; hence, the broken back. This is a reference to any process by which cataclysmic failure is achieved by a seemingly inconsequential additional event. This also gives rise to “the last straw” often used when something is deemed to be the last in a line of unacceptable occurrences.  Everyone suffers from this at one time or another in his or her life.

You know now that these events are simply triggers and a release that may be less troublesome to resolve – a bit of yelling or snappy answer and it’s over.  What you haven’t attended to is the underlying cause that will cause these events to trigger your emotions over and over again.

One or all of these methods can help you to manage these events calmly.

1.  Laughter.  Usually there is something that can tickle your silly bone if you search for it.  Even if it’s ironic humor, laughter will lighten the situation and trigger a more positive response.

2.  Use your oxygen immediately to manage your stress.  Breathing slowly and deeply will get oxygen to your brain and muscles and ligaments.  You will respond more intelligently and your shoulders will relax.  This is a method that is ALWAYS

AVAILABLE and its FREE.  Empower yourself, if you do nothing else in the management arena, learn to use this secret weapon.  It works mentally and physically – that’s the way human kind is built!

3. Keep in mind, we are all human and “stuff” happens to the best of us.  This is just a fact of life.  This trigger incident will be over quickly if you let it.

4.  Divert your attention to something that is really higher on the priority list.  You may have to clean up a mess or handle the scenario, but make it quick and positive.  You have more important stresses to attend to than the occurrence of these little irritants.

5.  To begin to really attend to the “big stresses” – you have many options:  stress reduction exercises, meditation, on line websites, personal training.  Don’t give up.  Take a breath and learn how to help yourself!

“Things do not change: we change.”

Henry David Thoreau

*Why not enter our contest (upper left corner). You have the chance to win some great prizes.*

Do you remember the last time you laughed out loud?

Laughter is a powerful antidote to aid in the management of stress, pain, and conflict.

There is nothing that works faster, or can lighten your burden better than laughter.  It is one of the most powerful tools you have to support your emotional health, and your daily mood.

Physical benefits

A hearty laugh relaxes the entire body, relieving physical tension and stress, and it leaves your muscles relaxed for almost an hour after.

Laughter releases endorphins, the body’s natural feel-good chemicals.  These endorphins promote a sense of wellbeing, and can even help to relieve pain.

Your resistance to disease will increase as you incorporate into your life.  It decreases stress hormones and actually increases immune cells and infection-fighting antibodies.

Laughter even protects the heart!  It actually improves the function of blood vessels and increases blood flow, which can help protect you against a heart attack and cardiovascular problems.

Humor is really infectious.  When you hear the sound of roaring laughter, even if you are not aware of the scenario, you will most certainly smile!  The domino effect of laughter triggering laughter triggers those physical changes in the body.

Remember hearing a child laugh wildly as he or she is being tickled….just the sound makes anyone within hearing distance enjoy their day just a little more.

When laughter is shared it always increases happiness.  It binds people together is a shared joy.   Laughter simply makes you feel good, and the feeling stays with you long after the sound subsides.

Laughter helps you keep a positive and optimistic outlook.  It is rather a “mini-vacation” from sadness and pain, and even in very difficult times, laughter can surely help in making you feel better.  It stimulates the brain and makes you ready for more fun and relaxation.  It stays in the memory and can cause you to smile hours afterwards.

Benefits for optimum mental health

You simply CANNOT feel angry, sad, or anxious when you are honestly laughing.  Not the kind of “laughter” you may feel required to do when you are trying to be courteous or join the group.  The kind of laughter that comes from your heart is irreplaceable.

You will reduce stress and increase your energy because you are more relaxed.  Humor allows you to shift your perspective to see situations in a more realistic way, a less threatening light.  This type perspective creates psychological distance, which can help you avoid feeling overwhelmed about the circumstances.

Laughter is innate and it is your right.  Though often you may feel there is nothing to laugh about, you can always find humor in life – if you just try!  The absurdity of stoic behavior abounds in life.  If you focus and allow yourself to picture things in a different way, you will really find there is so much to laugh about; you will want to weave laughter into every day of your life once you feel it’s benefits!

Read a joke book.  Go to a comedy club.  Rent a movie.  Get together with friends.  Start laughing today!  Practice a positive attitude change through the use of positive humor.  Begin to see humor all around you in puns, irony and oxymora.

Remember – “cutting” humor is not really funny.  If your words pierce someone’s heart, or if you have to say “Oh, I was just kidding” – it’s probably not humorous, but more in the line of ridicule or words that are harming someone else.  Condition your mind to find positive humor and it will surely help manage your stress.

There is NO return policy, so it might be best to learn to manage the stress that child rearing will bring into your life!

The Plus Side

Not all of the stress that comes into your life when you begin parenting is bad, make no mistake about that, there will be memorable moments for the rest of your life.  It is the toughest job you’ll ever have; it is also the sweetest, and can be freckled with fun and laughter.

The Best Medicine

Laughter is one of the best ways to release stress and feel good.  The chemicals released in the body through laughter reduce pain and tension.  So there is probably no substitute for finding ways to have fun and to laugh with children

Children keep you young.  They remind adults of the “innocence” we all once knew. Their actions have not yet been stuffed into a rigid format, and their honest appraisal of things, as their vocabulary grows, will keep you smiling, and maybe once in a while, cringing.  It is always a “challenge”.

There is no need to be depressed or anxious.  YOU ARE UP TO THE TASK!

Physical Endurance

The physical factor about child rearing is we do get physically stronger from the day we carry that little bundle of joy home.  Carrying a child, extra groceries, diapers, baby equipment, and all the extra do-dads we get to help our children, will also mean extra carrying, extra cleaning, and extra hours filling the needs of children.

Though you may be tired initially, you will get used to the schedule. Before you know it your body will grow stronger and your resilience better.

The Magic

Help yourself AND your children to calm down and relax.  Don’t forget the children will share your stress and the way you manage it. Don’t yell and scream, or break down and cry in front of your children.  They will take it personally, and even if the incident was initiated by their actions, children’s self-esteem for a lifetime is at risk here, as they go through their childhood years. You love them and you are their guardians and mentors.

Work on preventative techniques by letting them learn the very same techniques you are working on for yourself!  Teach them to breath and stretch, and make it fun!

Hyperactive and/or impulsive children, in particular, gain the most from learning techniques that relax their minds and bodies, recognize their internal feelings, and release inner tension.

Relaxation strategies empower children with a feeling of peace and self-control.  Do breathing exercises with your younger children and they will see it as a game and having fun together.

Find a meditation or yoga class and encourage your older children to participate with you.  Many parents already know breathing techniques and the positive effects of controlled breathing through Lamaze or other natural-childbirth classes.

Controlled conscious breathing has the benefit of relaxing muscles and reducing stress.  Many believe it is useful in the management, perhaps cure of some physical ailments and disease.

Help your child to learn to take conscious, deep breaths to relax. Show him/her how to inhale deeply (preferably through the nose, but through the mouth ins fine) and slowly exhale through the mouth.

Teach you child to isolate different body parts and relax them with each slow breath inhaled.  For example, while lying on the floor, instruct the child to tighten or squeeze toes on the left foot, then relax with a deep breath.

Now tighten the left knee and upper leg, and then relax and breathe.  Proceed in this manner to the right side.  Have them then relax by breathing.  Proceed in this fashion to the lower body, to the abdomen and upper body, each arm, hand/fingers, chest, neck, jaws and face.

This is particularly helpful for children to recognize that when they are angry, stressed, or nervous (even about taking a test or performing in a school program), they will recognize the tightening of certain body parts.

If they recognize when fists clench, jaws tighten, and stomachs harden, they have power over their bodies to relax and gain control.

They can consider using their oxygen a “secret weapon” – and it is!  They can breathe deeply and “send” their breaths consciously to relax body parts.  By sending the breaths to a hand, for instance, the child can silently prompt the hand to relax the grip.  Tell the child when the body is relaxed it is easier to think and plan!

Before any “stress” the child might be facing, AND IT’S EASY TO FORGET THEY HAVE STRESSES, INCLUDING YOUR REACTIONS, they can use their secret weapon to calm themselves!  Let them know their brains need fifty percent more oxygen to think well…and the breathing will help them be calmer and wiser for tests!  It’s true.

Hence, as your children learn stress management techniques, it will help them throughout their entire lives, and it will also help you because they will be calmer and more aware of their own body powers.  Children are ripe to learn, and what could be a better gift for the children and the parents than to learn to empower themselves and find peace in this day and age.  They

will also find extra self-esteem in their accomplishments!

Lastly, remember, make it fun, and keep in mind REPETITION is the mother of all learning.  Help all the family together!

The benefits we experience when pets are in close proximity to us are really not recognized fully by most of us.  There is a powerful human-animal connection that is only now being fully recognized.

There have been many workshops held on the benefits of owning pets.  There were just a few scientific papers available on the subject a few years ago, though snow studies have revealed that pets boost survival rates for coronary care unit patients. That was an eye-opening finding.

People have known the healing effect for centuries, but recently new data on the role of chemistry in the relationship has been revealed.

When a person interacts with a pet, the central nervous system releases several hormones that cause feelings of pleasure.  One hormone in particular, oxytocin, seems to play a major role in reinforcing this bond.

The hormone creates a sense of warmth, nurturing and calm.  Simply petting dogs releases the same chemical in both humans and the animals!  Researchers know this with certainty, but are not clear as to how two species can produce feelings of peace, closeness and contentment in each other.

What is clear is the fact that this bonding is very helpful in managing stress of almost any kind.

Animals (particularly dogs) give unconditional love.  It doesn’t matter if the owner yells, or is unkempt, or even doesn’t offer the best care to the animal.  All the animal wants is love and approval by their owner.  They accept their owners and companions without qualification.  An animal’s acceptance

is nonjudgmental and forgiving. They don’t play psychological games people sometimes play.  They accept you the way you are.

Pet ownership particularly helps children to learn to read body language.  The experiences children have with their pets later develop into relationships with people, and actually helps develop more empathy for others.

Children who are fortunate to have a pet learn nurturing skills, and the responsibilities that come with it. They also have in store for them lots of fun to share with a new pet.

Over eons it is well established that touch is very important for the nourishment for our spirits and minds.  Sometimes people who have been neglected find it difficult to accept touch from other humans.  The relationship with animals, simply the act of petting a dog, can create feelings of security and warmth; feelings of love without demands humans often desire.

In cases like these, having an animal to hold, hug, and touch can make a world of difference to people who would otherwise have no positive, appropriate physical contact.

Astounding cases of pet heroism and loving acts prove that the interaction between pets and humans, even just passing contacts, are healing and worthy of categorizing as important relationships in the management of stress.

Find ot for yourself and consider, if you don’t own a pet, possibly adopting one for yourself and your family.  More fun and less expensive than therapy, pet ownership can truly be a healing factor in your life.

Don’t Hurry to Death!

Over thirty-three million people will be traveling by car this year for the Thanksgiving holiday. Tradition dictates we cook fabulous meals (which usually means you will spend more money at the grocery store), visit relatives, or have visitors for dinner, and take the time off, whether we can afford to do so or not!

Wow! The REAL thanksgiving will probably happen AFTER the holiday and time off work – if it comes at all!  Here are a few tips to actually help you enjoy what is supposed to be a festive time for family and friends. These are some “stress buster” thoughts to put into action.

Advertisers like to promote the standard “turkey dinner with all the trimmings”.  They like to sell us decorative items and special desserts.

Don’t BUY into the necessity of all they are selling.

Don’t feel obligated to invite people if you cannot financially afford to do so.

The day is meant to express gratitude for our bounty.  If you are healthy, or have a family or even just a place to rest your head at night, be grateful.  So many on this planet don’t have even meager food or belongings.  Keep those thoughts fresh in your mind.

If you are driving to visit, prepare in plenty of time to be relaxed during the drive.  All those last minute details, all the planning, all the hopes of a great time will be dashed if you find yourself in a head on crash because your stress level is out of control!  Take a breath.  Think about that.

Sing.  Take a breath.  Play positive music that makes everyone’s heart beat calmly.  Laugh together. Teach the family to breathe, and take a breath together!  This will help everyone.  It will create a calmer presence and less stress for everyone.

We are not guaranteed more than the moment. Be grateful for time together.

If you are going to share time with family or friends, then certainly, if you are running late, make sure you are considerate enough to call if you feel there is any chance you will not be on time.  The love those people feel for you should forgive the tardiness.

Don’t yell at the children because they are not flying on YOUR time schedule.  They are children.  Try to be flexible and remember what is important.  How great is a memory of someone screaming, “Hurry, we’ll be late for our Thanksgiving visit!”

Create a new “tradition”.  Really make the time festive and restful too.  Present whatever food you have with grandeur and say, “We are having food to eat tonight!  How wonderful is that!”

You don’t need to pop a pill to find peace!

If you have watched anything on television or the Internet, or even listened to the radio, you have been bombarded with the advertising of pharmaceuticals.

Much of the advertising claims you will “calm down and find the peace you seek”.  Photos of a miserably unhappy person change to someone who is happy and full of joy.

Right along with the promises comes the required warnings that the drugs might cause worse problems than what you are currently experiencing.  This can include thoughts of suicide!  The problem of drug “overuse” – sometimes leading to death – has increased dramatically.

Come on! These advertisers seem to think they are dealing with stupid people. Those who buy into the programs are usually just uninformed about the pharmaceuticals each of us have within our own bodies.

Some people truly need medical help, and specific prescription help (this website does not diminish the importance of the availability of these things for these people), but the majority of human beings are capable of accessing help from within themselves.

The first thing we have to do in order to use our own healing capability, and reduce our stress level, is to exercise our intellect.  At the mental level you must come to the realization that ONLY YOU and YOUR THOUGHTS have any REAL control over your mental and physical health.

Thoughts held in our minds produce after their own.  Hence, your mind is your kingdom, and you must rule it wisely.  Release and let go of any thoughts that are unworthy of you.

Blame, shame, guilt, embarrassment, and anger are unworthy of being reiterating over and over in your mind.  Wipe out those useless thoughts that keep you in bondage and increase your stress level.  They can only build feelings of depression, criticism, resentment, and feelings of being unloved.  Replace the weak thoughts and strongly affirm positive thoughts.  Remember thoughts held in our minds produce after their own!

At your emotional level, try to practice positive attitude change

with the use of a positive sense of humor.  See the true humor all around you in puns, irony, oxymorons, and just plain silliness.  Laugh yourself out of your stress.

Positive humor helps condition the logical mind, and eventually it will yield to the omniscience of a calm and sweet spirit.

Hold in your mind thoughts, which include “I am becoming calmer”.  I am changing to positive thoughts, which will in turn decrease my negative stress level.  I am changing for the better.  My changes within will change my outward presence and my response to stressful situations.”

You are the captain of your ship and you want to sail calm waters.  Begin to make it happen today.  Take a breath and think of something that is wonderful (example: the color of the leaves in fall, or a laughing child).

Create your life and diminish out of control stress.  Take another breath.  Exhale slowly and cast out the negative.

Inhale again and begin to regenerate and relax simultaneously.