Stress Management Magic

STOP!  READ THIS BEFORE DOING ANYTHING ELSE

It doesn’t matter if you are buying into the “black Friday” shopping hysteria, preparing for a trip, having company, or just fighting additional traffic in the stores and on the road.  If you are reading this, you must take just three minutes to do this mini-stress management post while reading it. It may save your sanity and save the holiday.

Take a breath right now.  Exhale.  Remember, when under pressure we stop breathing (at least adequately for good thinking).  Our shallow breathing doesn’t provide what we need to kick in optimum thinking for our brain. It furthers tension as muscles and ligaments tighten.

Take another breath, a bit slower, and deeper this time. As you are inhaling, think:  I am pulling in oxygen that will help me relax and regenerate with each breath.

Now exhale slowly through the mouth repeating in your mind:  I exhale all my worries and know I am doing the best I can.

Crying children, burned pie, dust on the coffee tables, financial woes, and short tempered citizens are all potential holiday “breakers”.  Don’t let things get to you.  In the long-term scheme of things, these little irritants won’t play into your life but for a nanosecond.

Breathe and think positively. Teach your brain to create those “cell impressions” from which you can empower yourself simply through your thoughts. Ultimately, if you are consistent, your body physiology will be changed for the good.

Stretch your arms high into the air and wiggle your fingers.  Roll your wrists one way, and now the opposite direction.  Take another deep breath and exhale and release any unforgiving thoughts or hostility.  Clasp your hands and stretch to the heavens.  Now shake your hands as you bring them down.

Put aside any doubt and release any tendency to “make things work out” or to force an outcome. Open your thoughts and your life to the source of all intelligence and let go of worry.

Worry changes nothing for the better. The only thing worry does is increase in increments, and cause more worry, more problems, and affect us physically in a negative manner.

Sit with lower back pressed to the chair and shoulders down and back.  Deep breathe.  You are empowering yourself.  Exhale.  You are making room for more healing oxygen.

Bend your right ear to your right shoulder.  Hold for a moment and breathe.  Now left ear to you left shoulder.  Breathe again slowly.

Spend time on thoughts that are positive and quality and you will draw those things to you. Be mindful of your oxygen intake, and as you exhale send all those negative thoughts into oblivion.

This day is yours – CREATE a beautiful one for yourself and those around you.

THINK before you speak. Take a breath and it will spark your intellect.

Remember words are sharper than any knife and they pierce the heart.

Take THIS opportunity to tell someone you love or appreciate him or her.

Make these moments of value and the worth of your actions will ultimately come back to benefit you!  It always works… The things you think and the way you breathe!

The things that you think, and the quality of your oxygen will ultimately become your life and health.  YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF WHERE YOU GO FROM HERE.

What is past is past. The future is but a “hope for the best”.  The moments you have are now.   Make them of value to you and those around you and create beautiful moments in time.

Don’t Hurry to Death!

Over thirty-three million people will be traveling by car this year for the Thanksgiving holiday. Tradition dictates we cook fabulous meals (which usually means you will spend more money at the grocery store), visit relatives, or have visitors for dinner, and take the time off, whether we can afford to do so or not!

Wow! The REAL thanksgiving will probably happen AFTER the holiday and time off work – if it comes at all!  Here are a few tips to actually help you enjoy what is supposed to be a festive time for family and friends. These are some “stress buster” thoughts to put into action.

Advertisers like to promote the standard “turkey dinner with all the trimmings”.  They like to sell us decorative items and special desserts.

Don’t BUY into the necessity of all they are selling.

Don’t feel obligated to invite people if you cannot financially afford to do so.

The day is meant to express gratitude for our bounty.  If you are healthy, or have a family or even just a place to rest your head at night, be grateful.  So many on this planet don’t have even meager food or belongings.  Keep those thoughts fresh in your mind.

If you are driving to visit, prepare in plenty of time to be relaxed during the drive.  All those last minute details, all the planning, all the hopes of a great time will be dashed if you find yourself in a head on crash because your stress level is out of control!  Take a breath.  Think about that.

Sing.  Take a breath.  Play positive music that makes everyone’s heart beat calmly.  Laugh together. Teach the family to breathe, and take a breath together!  This will help everyone.  It will create a calmer presence and less stress for everyone.

We are not guaranteed more than the moment. Be grateful for time together.

If you are going to share time with family or friends, then certainly, if you are running late, make sure you are considerate enough to call if you feel there is any chance you will not be on time.  The love those people feel for you should forgive the tardiness.

Don’t yell at the children because they are not flying on YOUR time schedule.  They are children.  Try to be flexible and remember what is important.  How great is a memory of someone screaming, “Hurry, we’ll be late for our Thanksgiving visit!”

Create a new “tradition”.  Really make the time festive and restful too.  Present whatever food you have with grandeur and say, “We are having food to eat tonight!  How wonderful is that!”

How to Cope

School is on and parents are all handling it differently! Some can hardly wait for school let out for the holidays, to get the children back to the home environment, and be free of replenishing supplies that are necessary; such as the cost of books and school supplies and clothing.

They relish relinquishing the tasks of shuttling children to school activities and sporting events, PTA, helping with homework, and all the parental duties that go along with those who have children in school.

Others are dreading the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays.  They envision hours in a day with the kids saying: “Mom (or dad), I’m bored.” “I’m hungry.”  “Can you take me to my friend’s house?”  “It’s too cold to play outside”.  “Can I have friends over?

Either way, with children, there will always be stressful scenarios. Scenarios you can succumb to by letting the stress envelop your being, or scenarios you can deal with by managing the stress effectively.

When you begin to feel yourself paralyzed by the “dread” of things to come, do exactly what you are doing right now!  Take a moment or two to do something for you!  Take a breath.  Seriously.  A bit of mindful breathing is a great beginning.

Whether it’s reading a quick article, just sitting still for a few moments, or taking an unplanned trip to the store to pick up a few things you need or want!

You are DIVERTING your own attention from this anxiety surrounding “school and children”.  Instead of focusing on potential problems in the future, concentrate on something else for the moment.

Diversion is good.  The definition, simply put, is “an instant of turning something aside from its course”. We are only capable of thinking about one thing at a time!

This does not suggest that you will never need to think about the challenges you face, but it will give you just a bit of time (while doing one of these activities or something you choose) to take a breath!

When you breathe, your intellect is sharper.  When you are stressed out your breathing slows without even knowing it, which in turn stresses you out even further.

This is the bottom line.  You will never complete the list of things that need to be done. Something else will always manifest as a potential stressor.

The only time we are done for sure is when we are dead! On going demands will bury you alive though, if you don’t realize that the only way to be in charge is by making the best choices in handling your challenges, and then letting go.

Ninety five percent of all that you spend your life worrying about NEVER COMES TO FRUITION! Honestly!  Worrying about not being able to “take care of all that is necessary”, is simply a waste of your time and energy.

Prioritize, delegate, stay in the moment.  You know what needs to be done. It is about time you give yourself credit for handling so much already!

Remember life will always give us stress to manage, whether it is good or bad.  We may not have the choice in what happens to us, or the demands that challenge us, but we ALWAYS have a choice in the response to these things.

It is not necessary to implode, or explode. Loosing your cool will only worsen the scenario. When you find yourself in the position of having just too much to do, perhaps in too little time, and there is NO WAY to change it, stop for a moment and rethink it!

If you are the person in charge of doing the multitude of tasks that face you, then the only thing you can do is ACCEPT doing what you can, realizing that is the best you can do.  RESPOND calmly and do all that you can do.  That is all you can do!

Is the list “TO DIE FOR”?  Don’t let life’s challenge paralyze you.

The truth is, unless you have someone you can “pass the ball to”, you’d better start using positive affirmations to create those brain cells necessary to take care of business.

Don’t let the negatives overpower you.  Take a breath and think:

“I will get things done to the best of my ability.”

“I will take each moment as it comes and remember that I am capable and dedicated to finding resolve to challenges.”

“I will remember that I can only do so much in one day, one hour, one moment.”

“I will remember that my children and all the children whose paths I cross will look to my attitude and demeanor as either horrible or positive, and they will learn from me.”

If you are a person of faith then truly the first thing that should be done is asking for help.  Just as your children look to you for help and ask repeatedly for it, pray often!  Of course with prayer must come letting go and letting God oversee your needs.  That’s faith.

If you do not believe then your only choice is to decide whether you want to let things drive you crazy, or whether you will simply do what you have to do!  Affirm your capabilities and breadth of intellect sprinkled with the right amount of emotion.

Get ready whatever may be headed your direction.  Stay flexible.  Anticipate all the positive things that will enhance your children’s lives, and remember this time is fleeting.

One day soon you will recall the excitement of these days, wishing you could do it all again. Make them calm and joyous. Make your children glad to be alive and excited about it all.

YOU CAN DO IT!  Take a breath and rock and roll.

Prepare for the holiday driving and get a head start just by continuing to read this article!

It is a sign of our times when you can look into the dictionary and find “road rage” listed as a noun!   Road rage is defined in these terms: Violent anger caused by the stress and frustration involved in driving in difficult situations: aggression on the road, vehement behavior, hostile thoughts, ready to attack, overly assertive, force.

Don’t kid yourself.  You will see road rage if you travel over this holiday weekend.  Be prepared.

First we need to use our intellect.  Driving a vehicle is driving a potential DEADLY WEAPON.  Small vehicles can weigh as little as one thousand eight hundred and seventy five pounds.  SUV’s weigh from two thousand pounds to the sunny side of eight thousand pounds.  An eighteen-wheeler’s load weight limit is eighty thousand pounds.

Think about it.  If you drive a vehicle on the smaller end of the weight scale you are fodder for any “road rager” on the rampage!

From the mid-size vehicles right up to the trucks on the road, the weight alone can do deadly damage in an accident.

Here are a few thoughts to begin our transition from rage to peaceful defensive driving.

1.  The reason the DMV doesn’t issue driver’s licenses to children is because adults are supposed to be rational.  Road rage leaves that thought in the dust.  Be an adult.

2.   It has been proven, time after time, that no matter how you speed to where you are going, you will arrive at approximately the same time as the person who exhibits aggression and speeds.  You will arrive without incident and in a more peaceful manner if you don’t let your emotions override your intellect.

3.  If you insist on texting, eating, reading, or applying make-up while driving, there is probably no hope for you, as you haven’t the intelligence to realize you put your life and the lives of others in great danger doing these things.  You are also increasing your stress level.  Slow down.  All these things will get done in good time.

If you ask now, “Well, what can I do to keep from raging, everyone is so rude and in a hurry?”

Here are a few suggestions that can begin to put YOU back in the driver’s seat (so to speak).

Take a few more minutes before getting into the car to make sure you have maps, lunch, and all the travel items you need, and think about your attitude.  This is supposed to be a holiday, a happy time.  Let that good time begin with you.

When the journey is on and someone ticks you off, first thing to do is to take a breath.  If you aren’t already in an accident because of the jerk’s actions, then consider that a blessing and take another breath.

Remember that when stressed out we stop breathing momentarily.  We need oxygen to function and think optimally.  You intake will calm you down and allow you to use your wit instead of being outwitted by anger and irrational thoughts.

Remember who is in the car with you.  Do you really want to take the chance of stealing their lives because you cannot control your anger?  I think not.

Take time to stop for a mini-break and let everyone get out and stretch and get a drink of water.  Being crunched up in the car cuts off your oxygen supply and when you straighten up and stretch just for a minute or so, you will regenerate and feel better.  Those mini-breaks can be life saving.

Don’t allow someone else’s impatience CHANGE YOU.  This is your time, your trip.  Try thinking this:  “This guy must be miserable.  On a trip and acting like an idiot!  I’m here to enjoy myself and he is not going to take that away from me.”

Even if you have to be polite J, move over.  Let the jerk by and don’t let him have your life-mentally or perhaps physically by pushing you into irrational behavior.

If you get stuck in a traffic jam wiggle your fingers and toes, take a breath, bend your neck from side to side to stretch it.  If you are stopped, blink your eyes several times as it will help them to relax a bit.

Talk to yourself.  Talk to your family.  Sing.  Tell jokes.  Laughter always lightens the mood!

It’s all a matter of  THINKING for just that moment before you get out of control.  To help you think, USE YOUR OXYGEN, you oxygen machine!

Remember that if you react sometimes it will prove extremely dangerous.  I actually flipped “a car” off that passed me and nearly caused me to have an accident.  I didn’t even think they could see me.  Wrong.

It was a car of gang-bangers and they slowed down and began to taunt me.  I was lucky.  I knew the freeway well and when I came to an exit that I knew they couldn’t backtrack and find me, I didn’t signal and make tracks to get away.  For all I DIDN’T know, they could have been armed.  It was scary.

Take a breath.  Have a fantastic holiday and BE SAFE!  Better late than dead.