Stress Management Magic

This writer began the website with the premise that I would always be truthful about handling stress. Today I’ll prove it.

I never dreamed the day would wind up like this.  It began like any other.  But one thing about life I know for sure is that you cannot count on things remaining the same, and just as you believe you “have things under control”, another stressor will come to fruition.

I have made many mistakes in this life, as we all do.  I know the majority of them and have endeavored to learn and go forth.  Apparently something triggered this and what is done, is done.

So where am I going with this?  This website is dedicated to teaching stress management techniques that work in crisis.  This “problem” is a huge crisis for me, and here is how I am handling it.

No one ever said some stress is not disastrous.  No one ever said it couldn’t break your heart – at least for a time.

The first thing I did was to allow myself to cry. The kind of cry that makes you sob long after the tears diminishes.    As a matter of fact, I am still weeping after several hours.  A good cry washes the eyes and releases all the pent up emotions that are strangling us from within.

I also stopped and used my oxygen to “settle down” and keep my body relaxed, and my mind functioning as optimally as possible.

If you are alone (and I am alone, for a time), remember there is help somewhere. I did hug my puppy. It’s proven that hugging or petting an animal is a great help to calm stress.

If you have a friend, neighbor or relative that you can share with, call them.  I said prayers.  There are also resources available to help you if you are desperate.

Call your church; look up websites for critical help.  Call local organizations that are available for counseling.

I am settled enough now to sit and write this post, and believe it-the writing has actually made me feel better.  It has made me quit crying, and settle down. It has diverted my attention to what is in front of me, and not the reality I can do nothing to change this situation right now.  I did not react and get mad.  I am slowing myself so I will be able to make rational decisions about this problem.

Go for a walk.  You can workout at the gym.  Diversion can be a lifesaver.

Remember, some things in life YOU will not be able to resolve like you would desire to do so!  That’s just the way it is.

Suicide is not an option.  It’s actually rather stupid as it

really stops ANYTHING.  No healing, no life.  It leaves a legacy you probably wouldn’t want to have as people are remembering you.

Alcohol, drugs, cigarettes – they are not the answer.  They take away your true self and muddle your thoughts and reactions.

So this is the reality as it is happening to me.  You may not be able to change the scenario, but you always have a choice as to your response to it!

I am going to take a few more breaths, close for today, and simply say, YOU CAN HANDLE whatever comes up as a stress factor.  I am.

You are not alone either.  If you need to do what I am doing by writing, drop me an email and I will respond with the best help I can share!

No matter what age you are, good health habits are a huge part of taking care of yourself.  Practicing good habits do not guarantee that you will never get sick, or that you will live longer, but they will improve the way you feel and the quality of your life.  They also build your immunity, which can keep you from “catching” frequent colds and letting illness rule your life.

You only have one body to live in, so let’s review a bit of pertinent information. It’s not as difficult as you think.

Stay active with exercise

Don’t respond with “I hate exercise”.  Exercise does not mean you have to spend your life at the gym.  It should be fun, interchangeable, and something that will trigger excitement instead of dread.

There is a world of wonderful ways to get exercise.  The first one is simply walking.   A recent study showed that by taking a brisk, half-hour walk just six times a month, you cut the risk of early death by forty-four percent!  That’s astounding.

If you just can’t “squeeze” that into your schedule – first of all, shame on you!  You are worth that minimum amount of time to keep your body healthy.  After all, if you aren’t healthy you can’t perform any function optimally.  The world that surrounds you, family, work, friends, peers, will all NOT GET the best of you – so take a breath and read on.

If you still reconcile that you cannot afford that amount of time, do this:  Park further from the store.  On a break walk (even if it’s up and down the back stairs or through the office.)

Take your lunch and find a friend and walk the first fifteen minutes.  Stand in front of the television and walk in place.

Anything you do will help to better your health.  The trick is to do it regularly.  Get in the habit of allowing you that minimal amount of time to help your mind and body.

Your circulation will be better and you will return to your job refreshed.  A ten-minute walk can be relaxing and invigorating too.

You can join a health club.  Take a yoga class, walk with a friend, or play tennis.  Vacuum. That may not be the most fun, but consider it a dance, and sing, and it will be better.  Even gardening is a great exercise.  Body movement and breathing are keys to good health.

Exercise has many benefits.  It reduces STRESS, boredom, depression, and improves sleep.  It improves the skin and muscle tone.  It improves blood circulation, balance and flexibility.  It lowers blood pressure and even reduces the risk for adult-onset diabetes.

So now – get up and shake everything.  Take a breath.  Come

on, it’s you LIFE!  Do something to make it better.  This is easy stuff.  Take another breath and stretch your arms above your head and remember – “I am alive.  I can do whatever I choose!

It’s REALLY my option!”

You may as well.  You never really plan to do anything anyway except say, “I tried”.  You might as well give up.  Give in.  Succumb to challenges and trials..

The only person you are destroying – ultimately – is YOU.

SO DON’T GIVE UP!

If you want to change – do it.

If you want help – ask for it; seek it.

If you are alone – pray.

If you are afraid – think of the worst that can happen.  Accept it – then it’s all up hill from there.

The only devastation is from within.  The only defeat is your acceptance of it.  The only one in charge – IS YOU!

Get off your gluts and begin again.  You want stress management?  That’s  my advice.

You are the captain of your ship.  Sink or carry on man!

If you think you are stressed out, look around you!  You can see it on the faces of your family and friends.   You can see how the pressure of putting twenty things to juggle in the hands of a peer at work affects them.  You can hear it in their voices.

You can see the worry by the deep creases in their brows.  You can hear it in the voice of a mother who yells at her child, not to be mean, but because she is tired, and is feeling pressure mounting and tension building.

Notice the disgruntled worker who looses it and flies into a violent rage. His stress is revealed through the explosion manifested from the implosion that took an outward reaction to stress.  They too are on the verge of exhaustion, and could be creating high blood pressure and a potential heart attack!

Don’t say it doesn’t matter how other people feel, because the truth is, it does.  Where there is stress there is disharmony, discomfort, and danger lurking in every corner.

You can be a key factor in changing things if you begin with you!

So how do we work out of these scenarios?  We learn to REALLY manage stress, and REALLY relax!  I don’t mean the kind of relaxation that is poured into a glass, or the kind that you feel when you smoke a cigarette or have a food binge session.  Those things are NOT really relaxing!  Trust me.

Sit back a bit and straighten up and take a nice slow breath in through the nose. Think about it moving throughout your head, giving your brain optimal oxygen.  Then exhale slowly.

With just that simple exercise, you have honestly improved your mind, your energy, and relaxed yourself at the same time.  Does this sound too good to be true? Not even!  It is the physiology of the human body to react in those ways without you even knowing.  But you will if you practice.

Remember the axiom, a Latin proverb, “repetition is the mother of all learning”.  We encourage our children to practice whatever task they are trying to accomplish, so we need to keep that in mind when it comes to ourselves.

You will only your best self if you treat yourself as you would a friend!

With each practice of just this breathing, you are creating new brain cells, and enhancing your life.  Your blood pressure will drop, and your muscles and ligaments and tendons will stay relaxed and flexible.

Do it once an hour.  Are you worth it?  Are you worth taking twenty to thirty seconds every hour to manage your stress and improve your life?  I think you are!

Actually these two “techniques” have been around for decades, but the reason you probably don’t often think of them as something that will manage stress, is that you may not realize the power these two techniques will present to you when practiced.

They may not seem like something that will really help manage your stress – but they do!

Simply written, these are the techniques.

1.  Forgive.

2.  Count your blessings.

Don’t stop reading and scoff, thinking “Oh sure…this won’t work.”   This is the truth; the magic of doing these two things, if you are sincere in heart, will astound you.

Beginning with forgiveness, you must open your mind enough to realize that whatever is still burning you with anger, and holding you from forgiving, whether it directed to a person or situation, is a huge stressor.

The power within you is endless, but you must begin to develop your receptivity of this power by growing in understanding and practicing changing your mind about a few things.  You must be willing to believe that two small techniques can be life changing.  The statistics are in.  Results have been proven.

To forgive you must be able to step out of the prison you have built around you and outgrow old tendencies to “to hold grudges” against your fellow human beings, and life itself

In doing this you will release a mountain of negative thoughts and feelings.  Old emotions that are pent up and that make you feel terrible, will be gone!  There will be a burden lifted from you.  Let someone else JUDGE what has happened…the people involved, or the scenario.

You don’t have to hang out with people you forgive. You just need to forgive them.  They are human, and so are you.  Personally I’ve made a million mistakes in my life, so I find it easy to forgive when I think of that.

Even “big forgiveness” for major wrongs is possible.  You see, the only person who suffers is the person who dwells in the hell of not forgiving.

Now, when it comes to counting blessings, there are always so many blessings to count if we just take a moment and think!

We are creatures who have been given that capacity…try it.

(If you need help – find it!  YOU ARE WORTH LIFE!)

Name ten things you are grateful for right now.  Here is my list right off the bat:

1.  My children and grandchildren are okay.

2.  My husband still loves me.

3.  I can walk, run, dance, see, hear, and laugh.

4.  I have running water.

5.  Music is available for me to surround myself with and enjoy.

6.  I don’t have to kill another animal in my life to survive, or to help my children survive.

7.  I can use the internet productively and choose NOT to be a pervert.

8.  Millions of people close to me haven’t been displaced because of flooding……..

9.  I still do believe in God and Jesus Christ.

10.  My puppy loves me.

This is NOT in the order of the absolute most important ….they just came to mind in a flash!

YOU STILL HAVE CHOICES IN YOUR LIFE IF YOU ARE A BREATHING HUMAN BEING.  THEY MAY NOT ALWAYS BE THE CHOICES YOU THINK YOU NEED OR WANT, BUT YOUR RESPONSE TO WHAT HAPPENS IS ALWAYS YOUR CHOICE.

CHOOSE WISELY AND CREATE WONDERFUL MOMENTS…THAT IS ALL WE HAVE ARE THE MOMENTS THAT ARE FLEETING.  SOMEONE REALLY CARES IN CYBERSPACE!to you, when used and practiced. .

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Also you can – Try yoga – Check out stress management classes on line – Take a breath and release old burdens and take in new thoughts – Pray -Talk to friends – Find a support group.

It’s easy to get caught up in all the negativity!  The Tip?

DON’T DO IT!  REFUSE!

CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE AND CHANGE THE MOMENT

Attitude has been described as “the presence of a hypothetical construct that represents an individual’s degree of like or dislike for a specific target.”

It is actually a personal perspective that can be positive or negative.  Negativity is harmful and definitely not in the realm of being optimistic.  You cannot have a negative attitude without feeling your stress increase. Negativity opens the door for failure.

CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE AND CHANGE THE MOMENT

Our attitude also drives the behavior of our body language. This obvious outward show of our mental attitude is a direct result of either positive or negative thoughts.

One wonderful thing about being a human being is that no matter what the circumstance, we always have a choice in how to respond.

The trick is do not REACT – take a breath and feed your intellect so you will make a better choice in your response. You will also find that if YOU take charge of your “attitude” about any situation, you will be empowered.

CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE AND CHANGE THE MOMENT

Life is just too short to waste a moment being a sour ball. We all have problems. I am no exception. If it’s not a financial problem, health problem, family problem, car problem, or work problem, then it may be a neighbor problem, etc. etc. etc. So what is your choice when problems arrive?

You can opt to be miserable.  Or you can remember to practice thinking in positive terms and remembering that life is about change.  Just when you think you can’t take any more, something changes.

Take a breath.

CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE AND CHANGE THE MOMENT

Remember, it’s your life, so don’t let life’s challenges steal  a moment from you. Don’t let life pass you by while you sink in an ocean of stress.

Start now.

CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE AND CHANGE THE MOMENT

Take a breath, and when you exhale, let all the problems fly out your fingertips. Do it again. YOU WILL BE IN CHARGE OF YOUR LIFE AND YOUR RESPONSE TO LIFE, if you JUST PRACTICE being in charge!

An Old Russian proverb says that repetition is the mother of all learning.  Five times throughout this article you have been reminded through repetition to: CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE AND CHANGE THE MOMENT.

Your amazing brain has begun to create new brain cell impressions and the next time a scenario arises that asks for

“attitude”, you will remember how you can take charge of the moment by recalling this simple statement.

CREATE a wonderful day!

This is for EVERY ONE of you out there is cyberspace!  Whether you are a student, a parent, a child, an employer, an employee, or a senior citizen……take a minute and think about what follows.  Change is possible at ANY age!

After studying and teaching stress management for over thirty years, I have some simple but life altering techniques, observations and realizations.

We all have the power to transform the natural stress that comes from living into energy capable of improving our physical and spiritual health

Secret number one is that the essence of life is transformation. These simple words hold the key for changing your life for the better. Join me in transformation and see if it isn’t so.  These are thoughts for the day that can transform your life and the lives of others

Cherish your pets and the lives of all animals.  They are gifts to us and can be dear friends.

When someone asks for a donation, try to give with whatever you can – So many people have been left homeless-and we are not their judges; just their brothers and sisters.

Breathe deeply and mindfully.  Do it again!

Remember to look for all those blessings we take for granted.  The breeze in the trees, the sound of singing birds, the laughter of a child, these are all blessings we can enjoy!

Take a walk. Crunch leaves as they begin to fall from the trees. Watch the changing colors…it’s AWESOME.  Love!

Humble beginnings or wealth from the start, what truly matters are things of the heart.

Take your family for a walk, or just do something spontaneous for fun together.  Love deeply.

Don’t keep yourself in a prison.  Take a break from your electronics and refresh the memory of talking to a real human, or sitting in the sunshine!

Take a breath.  Stretch.  Smile.

Make a point of actually playing with your children while they are small. Catch a fish, catch a ball, and catch precious moments. We are only here for one short period of time.

Watch the sun rise as darkness lifts, watch the sunset.  How many times have you left to see the stars at night or revel in the full moon?  Not enough in a lifetime for me.

If you can’t leave – take a mental vacation.  Even if it’s just for a minute or two, visualize a favorite place.  Listen to the sounds of nature.  Take a breath and use your mind to renew your zest for life.

Cherish the earth.  It is our home.

Cherish your body.  It is the only place your Spirit has to live!

Don’t let the sour expressions or negative attitudes of people affect your day.

Let your light shine through and be grateful for small miracles.  Start a cycle of sharing smiles and positive thoughts.

Say a prayer kneeling, with head bent and a humble heart and God will tend to your needs.

Take a breath and exhale all your negative thoughts.  Create a wonderful weekend for you and those you love!

Every single thought listed on this post is a form of stress management!  Our thoughts guide our actions.  Our actions build our lives.  Make them “right” thoughts and “thoughtful” actions.  It is a choice!

You can do it!

The answer is water.  Nothing quenches the thirst like cool, clear water.  Anything else you drink will make thirstier! This is fact.  That is how manufacturers insure sales.  Even “specialty water” has to have an additive to keep you coming back for more.

When you thirst, only water will satisfy the need.  Your body needs water to live.  You can survive only minutes without oxygen, and only days without water.  When you deny yourself this wonderful substance even your stress level will increase.  It happens because you NEED water to function optimally; just as you need oxygen.  Without these substances your internal organs cannot function properly, therein causing ultimately, physical ailments.  It’s a domino effect.  If you don’t feel good, it intensifies your stress level.

Even for those of you who think you don’t need much water – you are wrong!

Read on, my friends.  You may be one America’s finest people, but your body may be screaming for water, and yet the mind is not savvy to the value of drinking it for internal health…but internally your mind is also not functioning to peak performance.

Example:  If you don’t put gas and oil in your automobile – they stop running all together at some point.  You can only go for so long and they just quit.

Your body and mind are FINE instruments as long as they are “fed” what they need…which includes good oxygen intake, water, and nutritious foods.  These are the basics, but absolutely necessary.

For a human to stay hydrated, means your body chemistry combines chemically with water molecules. Water molecules are chemically “bound” to another compound or element within your body.

When someone says,” You don’t drink enough water”, they probably care for you!  When you don’t drink enough water various things happen.

First, remember that next to oxygen in the importance of life sustaining things we take into our bodies, water comes in second in importance. That is pretty high in the order of things we need to sustain life! We can live for only minutes without oxygen, and only days without water.

Here is a little known fact. When you don’t get enough water for your internal organs, they begin to take water from other organs. Amazing, eh? The body knows water is to maintain life. Often we don’t realize it

When you don’t get enough fluid in your tissues, your cells start to draw it from your bloodstream. Your blood will thicken (it makes sense – think about it), and it can put a strain on your heart or make you feel weak or light-headed.

For those of us who perspire profusely, you must replenish your fluids frequently; summer heat demands more water.

(When you are overheated, though, never gulp iced cold water rapidly.  It can be injurious.

I’ve heard, “But I don’t like water. It tastes awful.” “I feel like I am drinking nothing and it makes me feel too full.” That can be a blessing for those who want to loose a few pounds. Drink water about a half hour before a meal and you won’t eat as much. Really!

When I first made the transition from wine to water, (only Jesus can turn water to wine:), I would put my ice water in a lovely crystal wine class with some ice and a twist of lemon. It looked lovely and each time I took a sip I thought “Ummmmmmm – no calories, no headache, no organs starving for water, and no guilt!

It worked. I got in the habit and I have over the years always taken a bottle or jug of water with me wherever I go in the summer. It is mandatory.

If you need variety, drink caffeine free sports drinks or iced fruit juices (add water to keep calories down). It’s fun to be creative. I like sparkling water just flavored with a twist of lemon, lime or orange peel.

Fruits and vegetables can supplement some water intake if you eat five servings a day.

Watermelon, cantaloupe, oranges, apples are great examples of those types of juicy fruits. Fruit in the summer is magic. For vegetables, how about tomatoes or carrots?  Be creative.

Lastly, remember ALCOHOL and caffeinated drinks deplete your water supply.

This body will work for you for years and years, and in great health, if you just treat it with as much respect and care as you do an automobile. The requirements are easy, not as costly as auto repair, and will absolutely make you feel better!

You may not think so at first, but give it time and THINK: If I do the right things for my body and mind my spirit will function better too, and my health will improve. That is simply the physiology of the body!

Now get up and stretch a bit, walk out to the kitchen and get a glass of water (doesn’t have to be huge-just frequent). It is the nectar of God and a great healer!

There are many outstanding websites dedicated to introduce readers to the “why” of stress, it’s causes, and the management of it.  Each has a quantity of excellent information, and the majority of it is credible information. This is an amazing gift.

Stress Management Magic is unique, however, because our goal is to address specific and current challenges we all face in the area of stress management – not tomorrow – but today!

We teach techniques and work with you right online to begin to learn to change your life to one of peace and happiness amidst all the turmoil of 2010.

The time to begin learning to manage stress is not when you can squeeze in a day to think about it.  It is not when you can afford go to a class to practice or pay for a personal trainer. The time is NOW.

Begin now, and with our guidance, within a few short weeks, and perhaps sooner, if you will dedicate small increments of time throughout the day, you will find your world changing.

We offer food for thought on how to handle stressors such as anger, depression, divorce, loss of employment, financial challenges, and aging

We offer tips on improving relationships, managing stress at work, and dealing with a myriad of stress inducing scenarios.

Through posts we work on improving your child/parent relationship, communication skills, and on even improving your own health.

Our goal is simple.  We want you to learn techniques you can use anywhere and anytime.  WHY?  Because, we all have a right to be happy and at peace, and teaching the basic’s should NOT cost a penny!  You have a right as a human being to know how to use innate gifts for your benefit.

If then you choose to join a meditation class, a yoga class, another stress management program, or any other method to “enhance” what you’ve learned here, then bravo!

LET’S GET STARTED!

Take a slow breath in through the nose.  Your additional oxygen will relax and regenerate you simultaneously.  That is how the body works.

Exhale through the mouth, clearing carbon dioxide and making room for more oxygen.

Again, inhale slowly (think: I am feeling better).  Exhale  slowly (think:  I release my negative feelings).

Inhale slowly – exhale slowly.

Do this mindful breathing two or three times. ANY time of day when you feel stress beginning to mount, slow it down by doing this breathing.  Whether you think it will help or not – do it!  You are an oxygen machine, and this is the way the body works. You increase stress by not giving muscles, ligaments, and tendons needed oxygen.  Your brain needs fifty percent more oxygen to think optimally.

If you dareJ……..Push back the chair, and stand up for a moment.  Stretch your arms up to the ceiling and take a breath.  The natural response to a stressful situation is to hold our breaths.  This increases our anxiety as we are oxygen machines and need to breathe!  (You are not ignoring your job:  you are refining your intellect and maintaining a relaxed demeanor to do a better job!

Twist your body a bit.  Lift each leg and rotate your ankle in a few circles.   Wiggle your toes.  Stretch your fingers out and then crunch them together.  Now take another deep inhalation and exhalation.

If peers or family give you a strange inquiring look, just let them know you are taking a mini-management minute to improve your performance and regenerate a bit.  It does work.

When you resume your position, just before beginning the task before you, take another deep breath and give yourself a mental pat on the back.

It’s your life, your body, and your right to keep it finely tuned!  Onward and upward.

You CAN meet and rise above ANY stress that manifests in your life.  It just takes practice to create the brain cells that will be poised and dynamically respond with positive force.

The first step is to take a deep and mindful plug of oxygen into your oxygen machine!  When in difficult situations, whether it’s loosing a database, or perhaps facing a screaming combatant, we actually hold our breaths.  Think about it.  In turn our muscles, tendon and ligaments begin to tighten.

Instinctively we are preparing for the “fight or flight” syndrome and our stance becomes that of preparing for defense.  By unconsciously holding our breath we cut off our needed oxygen supply to make a more rational decision.  Our brains need fifty percent more oxygen to think optimally.

We need to put aside any doubt and release any tendency to “make things work out” or to force an outcome.

There is unlimited and abundant energy and you are in charge of whether it is positive or negative.

One of the most important exercises in managing stress is to expect the unexpected, and keep a habit of storing in your brain the belief that we are able to handle whatever happens to us!

None of us knows from moment to moment what our lives will challenge us with next.  In order to begin to manage stress we must be flexible to the idea that a new challenge may pop up, one we never dreamed would happen, and that no matter what we will meet the challenge.

The next step to begin real management of stress is to REFUSE to be negative and affirm, “I am getting better.  The situation will resolve with my calm perseverance.”  No matter how you feel at the time, whether you believe it or not, your positive affirmations make the statements true.

As you speak the words the body responds with positive energy growing and healing.  You will create brain cell impressions that reinforce your words. Do this repeatedly and you will find at some point that the thoughts automatically come to fruition in your mind and you will find a positive resolve with peace and the use of your own calm intellect.  It will happen!

Now take a few deep breaths and when you exhale remember your exhalations are making room for more wonderful oxygen to think optimally. Visualize all the negativity flying from your fingertips into oblivion and use your inhalations as a power surge for the mind and the body.  CREATE a wonderful day for yourself and those around you!