Stress Management Magic

May you think in order to be happier, you need more than you have right now – more money, more love, more freedom, more friends, etc. etc. etc.  Simply by thinking in these terms, you may be downsizing your sense of well being, and your own happiness!

Admittedly, evidence shows that genetics contribute to about fifty percent of your happiness set point.  However, that is a far cry from one hundred percent.

If you want less stress and you want to be happier, you must do two things.  You must make a commitment and an effort (as with any meaningful goal in life).  Maybe you won’t go to to a “ten” in happiness, but you surely will become happier!

Many people think stress takes happiness away.  It does.  So what do you do?  You change your attitude and expect happiness to be headed your direction – no matter what

Happiness is not a lover (though that does add to happiness).

It is not marriage, money, or a new destination.   These things contribute to your happiness, but not nearly as much as you might think

Lasting happiness has more to do with simply racking up pleasure experiences or material things…it has more to do with how you behave and think – and these things ultimatelycontrol more than many of life’s circumstances.

Here’s an idea:  help someone else by volunteering or being kind, or generous with your actions.  There is a report of feelings called a “helper’s high” and many people who follow this path even find an alleviation of aches and pains.

Diversion from your own stress and pain can truly add to your happiness.  If you can do something to help someone else, your happiness will accelerate.

In finding that “joy of giving”, you will find your stress diminishing.  Part of the problem with stress is that is you pay attention to it; let you get overwhelmed with it, it will get worse!

Do something that is meaningful to you.  If you do, the activity can promote a sense of gratitude, connectedness, forgiveness or optimism.  If what you do means something to you it will be most successful.

If you want to be happy schedule time to do something outside of your own “self-needs”.  Assess your strengths and develop practices that are best used for these endeavors.

Something as simple as a call to express love, or saying thank you with a robust feeling behind it, will begin the new journey.

Always you must use your oxygen.  If these posts repeat this over and over again, it is because it is the number one stress management technique to use.

Take a breath.  Think about this.  Do something this weekend.

You never know unless you try.  CREATE a happy and beautiful weekend!

WELL, DON’T.  You don’t really know what’s next.  You need not fear or dread what’s to come.  Take charge of your response to life, whatever happens.

Pain / Stress / Forgiveness = closely related feelings.  Both physical and mental pain are intrinsic, contained wholly within the human intellect and spiritual nature.  You all have more within you, powers yet untapped or realized.

Humans gifts often go to the grave with people not using their gifts or even recognizing them simply because the world has told them they aren’t up to the job.  You are up to it! You have to FIND, and DRAW, from that power within; the untapped reservoir of all the characteristics and strength you dreamed you would have.   Perhaps someone told you that you would fail or that you had no hope to accomplish anything in this lifetime. They were wrong and you know it innately.

Dealing with words wrongly spoken is a huge stress to handle.  So if it’s happened to you, just draw in a slow breath, wait a few seconds, and exhale fully through the mouth.

(In case you don’t know how to breathe for YOUR benefit, here it is – short and sweet – and life enhancing any time you choose to use it!)

“ Deep Breathing is the simplest and most important form of stress reduction. Most people breathe only from their upper diaphragm. This is not the way we were intended to breathe. We are particularly prone to breathe incorrectly when stressed, by taking quick and shallow breaths. The exaggerated form of this is hyperventilating, which some people do when experiencing an anxiety or panic attack. The proper way to breathe is to inhale deeply from the abdomen. You should be able to feel your lungs fill up with air as you inhale. If you do not breathe from the solar plexus, you are not getting enough oxygen. You may think that it looks better to hold your stomach in but you are losing out on vital oxygenation of the body. Deep breathing is a very quick way to release tension, particularly noticeable in the neck, shoulders and head (headache).

Stand any place and inhale deeply so that you feel the air expand in the lower part of your abdomen and your stomach extend out. Hold the breath as long as it is comfortable and then exhale slowly…”

Rachael Collins

02 April 2009

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Pain is a unique experience.  Pain can put a halt to any activity your may want to do.  It can stop you from every dream in your life.  If you can’t play, walk, move, sleep soundly, or think and concentrate, you are being robbed of your life.  It’s time to change things around!

Pain that you “think you can’t make go away” can, overcome you, and can change the way you feel about yourself and others.  It can destroy relationships and lives.  The secret to managing your pain is first to unleash all the anger you have for so many things. You have suffered enough.  You have been mad at others and circumstances long enough! Don’t dwell on the past ONE MORE MOMENT!

As you inhale think:  I am empowered

As you exhale think:  I forgive others and myself

As you inhale think:  I am wonderful and can make things better

As you exhale think:  No more negativity.  No more useless anger

As long as you are alive you have the capacity to change.  “Why should I change?”, you may ask.  If you are able to manage your stress, happy, love your life and yourself, no need to change.  Otherwise, think about it.

A person’s description of pain — where it is, when it starts, what helps to relieve it — are key to understanding pain. Only the person with pain knows exactly what it is like, whether mental or physical.

That is exactly why ONLY YOU can figure out where you go from here.  Let go of the need to control and stress will drift from you like the wave retreating into the fold of the ocean.

Make sure you get a good night’s sleep.  Set the stage and when you first are laying down, breath again, with thoughts than enhance you, and enfold you into a sweet slumber. When you are well-rested, you have more energy to get well, to enjoy life, and to do the things that are important to you

Get started now.  Breathe.  Let go of anger and sorrow.  Forgive others errors.  Forgive yourself.  These are major steps towards learning to manage your stress and live a more wonderful and peaceful life.

Seek other help for stress if need be, once you get started with these simple exercises of intellect.  Try yoga.  Walk with a friend.  Sign up for classes or other online help.  CREATE YOUR LIFE!

In stress management, even as “experts” in the field, we are always open to wonderful ideas, and this post is wonderful!  Enjoy and try it!  Now take a breath of two and read on……

(Don’t forget to enter the contesst – tomorrow is the last day!)

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“We can reframe bad days by spending some time
before going to bed each night to review the gifts we received that day.

When we have good days, we often find ourselves going over the details later, enjoying them a second and third time as we feel the joy of our good fortune. When we have bad days, we may find ourselves poring over the details of our misfortunes. However, we can re-frame those bad days by making it a daily practice to spend some time before going to bed each night to review the gifts we received that day. Regardless of our evaluation of the day—good, bad, mediocre—we can call forth the many blessings that were present. This practice transforms our consciousness as it reveals the fullness at the heart of our lives.

Some days it’s easy to recount the gifts we’ve received; on other days, we have to look harder for the offerings of the day, but once we do, we will find there are always quite a few. We can keep it simple and be grateful for the fact that we have a roof over our head, nature, food, and our health. Once we have fully experienced these gifts, we can move outward to the gifts that may require a little more thought such as the gifts of forgiveness, tolerance and acceptance that we may have learned that day. We can also always be grateful for the people in our lives who support us, no matter how bad our day may have been.

Just reviewing the many positive offerings in our lives provides a context for our difficulties that puts them in proper perspective, but we can also make an effort to see the gifts even in adverse circumstances. This can be challenging and may require some practice before it feels authentic, but we have all had the experience of a disappointment or loss leading to a surprising gain. Just remembering this and trusting the give and take of life can help us to remember that sometimes the best gifts of all are the ones we don’t recognize right away. In addition, the lessons we learn in the face of adversity are offerings in their own right, allowing us to count patience, wisdom, and fortitude alongside the other gifts of the day.”

from the writers at DailyOm

Do you really want to change your life?

Visualizing is the process of creating detailed mental pictures of behaviors that you wish to create in your life.   The visualization becomes an actual rehearsal for life.  It can be a very useful supplement to your other efforts to overcome shyness, or a lack of self-confidence.

Using creative visualization is not simply positive thinking.  It is a learning process.  This process can be used to create harmony and happiness for you and those close to you.  It can be used as a “rehearsal” before a test or an audition.  Visualization can be a real aid to managing stress.

Researchers have shown that visualization is authentic.  A university study found that people could actually increase the amount of weight they could life by visualizing themselves doing so.

Daydreaming is a form of visualization.  The difference between visualization and daydreaming is that there are gaps in daydreams, and oftentimes in daydreams we picture events that will actually never take place. In visualization we visualize something that is actually more likely to happen.

You need to practice visualization when you know you can relax without fear of interruption.  Try to choose a time when no one else is home, or make a sign that says “Do Not Disturb” and tack it on the door.  It’s okay to tell people what you are doing, but you need privacy and quiet to begin a session.

It is important to be relaxed when visualizing because you want to subconsciously associate a feeling of relaxation with the “situations” you are about to mentally rehearse.  When you actually enter into the “situation” you visualized, you want to be able to recall that relaxed state vividly.

During the visualization you will begin to find your body progressively relaxing as you find yourself becoming an actual part of the scene.  The more you practice the easier it will be to recall the feelings.

All you have to do is try to visualize the scene, and if fact, become a part of it. As you continue to practice you will be able ultimately rehearse for many of life’s stresses and their resolve.

Miracles of healing and excellence in your life are available for you if you are willing to dedicate a small, but consistent amount of time, each day, to practicing and retaining these techniques. Using creative visualization is a learned process. Each time will become easier.

Easy Steps

1. You need no special regimen other than relax with deep breathing for a few minutes before beginning your visualization.  Take off your shoes and put your feet up, be still and breathe to a quiet mood.

2.  Close your eyes and picture the scenario that is causing you worry or distracting you.

3.  Now visualize the exact same scene again, but this time picture yourself responding as you wish to respond.  Picture yourself performing effectively, self-confidently, and successfully.

4.  Visualize what you would like to have happen.  Visualize this scene until you have worked out all the details, the best approach, and how you will feel relaxed and confident.

As with any skill, remember with practice your visualizations will improve.  Be realistic about your visualizations and picture scenes that actually can happen if you believe and go forth with a great attitude.

True Story

I worked with a seventeen year old young man who dreamed of pitching in the majors.  Initially I “threw” the ball with instruction and

information to help him.

He “caught” the ball and was determined to visualize himself in the big league and pitching a “no hit” game.  He practiced every day in his room for 20-30 minutes.  He told me he did this for several months.

To my delight, when I spoke to his mother some months later he was signed to a major league team, and his first game he pitched a “no hitter”.  He gave me the credit, but it was not mine to my credit, but to his.

This young man did it all entirely through the REPEATED practice of what he realistically felt he could do.  He rehearsed until it came to fruition.

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You never know what can happen unless you try!

Thoughts drive our “action and reaction” responses to life. Thoughts manifest into how you conduct your life.  The following is a list of tried and true positive thoughts, that when thought or spoken, repeatedly, can help manage your stress.

These are positive thoughts are for your enhancement as a human being, and for all those in your circle of life.

You can refer to them as mantras, meditation, or just positive thoughts. If you apply them to your life you can change your life.  No one can do it for you.

This requires desire, dedication and repetition.

This requires desire, dedication and repetition.

The following thoughts can transform your life, one thought at a time.  Pick whatever is applicable to your need and use the thoughts as a reminder when you feel the time is appropriate.

1.   I will never let another be in charge of my actions, my healing, my thoughts, nor my heart.  I am in charge.

2.  I will dismiss all undue anxieties, and picture my life, as I want it to be.

3.  I am my own and have a choice in every word I speak and every action I take.

4.  I am an individual creation in the process of becoming my elevated destiny.

5.  I am able to shift my thoughts from emotion to intellect and back again to have a fine mix of both.

6.  I am healing, mentally and physically.

7.  I am learning, step by step.

8.  I will stop trying to control the present and the future.

9.  I will accept those things that I must accept.

10.  I will be courageous moment by moment.

11.  I will smile more.

12.  I will celebrate each moment with vigor.

13.  I can.  I will.  I am becoming what I see in my dreams and

feel in my heart.

14.  I will await the next change in life with anticipation,

regardless of the challenge it may require

15.  I will use the gift of “breathing” for my empowerment.

16.  I will never loose sight of the light before, and I will keep

my path in focus.

17. This moment is a new beginning.  I will savor it and hope

for the best.

18.  I will read again, and think again, these thoughts and           positive thoughts of my choice.

This is a stepping-stone to stress management for a lifetime.

If you find you need additional help  (most people do) – seek it  by find stress management classes, joining yoga, or contact one of the fine organizations advertised on this website or the many other sites available..

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CREATE a wonderful life for you and your loved ones.  It is possible and easier than you think, for as you think, so shall you become.

Marsha

http://www.stressmanagementmagic.com/2010/02/contest-stress-free/

Bathes are not strictly for women.  They are for all of us.  People of all ages spend money and time going some place to swim, or sit in a hot Jacuzzi.  Water is one of our most underrated and underappreciated gifts.  You bathtub is perfect for a light workout, water therapy and RELAXATION.

It’s cost effective and readily available without a reservation!

You will need these things for your productive, healing and peaceful bathing time:

1.  Music.  You must have music.  Make sure you are “electrically” safe, or not hooked to any electricity at all is preferable.  Use your Ipod, portable headset and player, a radio, or whatever you have, and make sure your music flows with your natural heart rate.  It should feel gentle and soulful. Music that is simpatico with your heart rate will enhance your relaxation.

2.  A candle, or a few candles, safely placed in areas to enhance the ambiance.  If you don’t have candles then simply try to make the lighting in the room soft for your eyes.

3.  Find a fragrance to capture within the room.  Try flowers, incense, and a splash of your favorite perfume or cologne to reward your sense of smell.

4.  You need a small cervical pillow with a waterproof cover – or simply a large towel rolled to place at your neck for comfort and support.

5.  Bubble bath, oil or whatever will nourish your skin.  Your skin will cover you all your life.  Keep it supple.

6.  A body sponge, pumice stone and / or wash rag.

7.  Epsom salts to add to your bath water for helping muscles and ligaments.

Set the scene while you run a hot bath.  Grab two soft towels and plan on twenty or thirty minutes alone.  Make a “do not disturb sign”.  Make your bath a reward in the comfort of your own home.  Only you and your family should have bathtub privileges.  Let the guests use a shower.

Now you are ready for this “stress management magic to begin

1.  Step into the tub (after it’s clean, of course), and when you first start drawing the hot water for your bath.  As the water fills the tub, sit down and paddle your arms side to side so the temperature stays even throughout the tub.

2.  When the tub is filled (I personally love a bubble bath), lean back on the towel or pillows and begin these easy stretches and movements.  Lift one leg slightly, and rotate you ankles in both directions.  Point and flex toes and then flex them, pressing them towards your chest.  Lightly massage the leg and foot and then alternate to opposite sight.  Repeat the movements.  As you are doing these things slowly breathe in and out.  Make the breaths deep and long, and relaxed.

3.  With hands in the water clench your fists.  Open the fingers wide and stretch them as far as you can.   Wiggle the fingers. Pull the water through your fingers.  Visualize how light the water is and yet how powerful.  You too can be “light in thoughts” yet powerful…if you manage your stress effectively.

4.  Remove the pillow and gently place your neck on the highest point of the tub itself.  If you need to, slide down in the water a bit.  Slowly, with mindful breathing, rotate the head from side to side.  Do it several times.

Next, press your chin towards your chest.  Hold it for a few moments and release.  As you do this note the stretch for your spine. Youth depends greatly on the suppleness of the spine.

When you decide to finish the bath, use warm water to rinse, splashing it first of the face and then the body.  It will be stimulating for your circulation and finish the cleansing part of the bath.  (Of course you have already soaped down and washed this body you live in!)

Be creative in the water and enjoy the healing properties and the time you have to simply concentrate on YOUR BATH!

Stress “Unmanaged” Will cause violence in a staggering number of people. It is almost inevitable!

Whether we choose to believe it or not, stress unmanaged will ultimately cause violence in many people.  Domestic violence, abuse towards children, intimate partners, (regardless of gender) and the elderly is on the rise.

Stress unmanaged can change of the body chemistry and can do can do infinite damage to credible brain function management. Anger causes words to cut to the heart, and actions to damage the recipient for his or her entire life in many circumstances.

Don’t be fooled.  Don’t be naïve.

There is a boiling point for water and for human emotions.  Whether the water stays in the pot or boils over, ultimately that, which is in the circumference of the pot, can be damaged or ruined entirely. .

Such is it with human behavior. Consequences of unmanaged stresses inflict suffering and can be life threatening.

Family conflicts are usually the result of stresses created in dysfunctional families.  Low levels of family conflict are warning signs for families that they are at risk of much greater abuse.  Any family member may intentionally or unintentionally contribute to the escalation of violence.

Stress is often created by feelings of hopelessness and or helplessness.  Other things that add to that could be excessive work hours, financial strain, and alcohol or drug abuse.

Personality disorders and/or early traumatic life experiences often predispose people to use violence in their own family relationships as adults.

Arguments created by stress can escalate.  Spontaneous arguments can lead to threats or actual physical assaults…without specific patterns, but they almost invariably escalate to more serious and injurious physical assaults.

We like to think “things” will resolve, or time will pass to “make it better”. For those individuals with particular personality traits or particular body chemistry, the danger lurks in close proximity to all who are near.

If YOU or someone near you is within the perimeters of this description, do something! Whether it be finding counsel (and if it is for YOU – please – do it now!) or just talking with family to consider action.

SOMETHING NEEDS TO BE DONE IMMEDIATELY>not just for the individual, but also for all who may tread in the same path, either by coincidence, or choice.

It YOU one of the people referred to in the paragraphs above, PLEASE take a slow breathe now in though the nose.  Now exhale slowly through the mouth.  Please do it again several times.

The added oxygen will calm you and help you to think more rationally, and remember, you have already taken the first step towards helping yourself by searching the Internet!  Don’t give up.  Don’t give in.  Connect with someone – perhaps a local group that deals with anger management.  Take time for yourself – you can’t afford not to do so!

If you are totally overwhelmed and need help and don’t know who to turn to you can email:  mo@jett.net.You are not alone.

Does it seem sometimes that stress inducing bad things gang up on you all at once?  You may wonder: “Why me?  Why do all the bad things happen to me!”?

Well they don’t.  We’ve all had pity parties.Many are justified, but they can’t continue you will suffer the consequences.If you make a list of “your bad things” and compare them with someone else’s you are sure to find many people have it worse than you do.  Think about it.

If that thought doesn’t mean much to you because it’s not “you”, then think about this:  you need to rethink what is happening, and respond to it with intellect and calm – for you!.

No matter what happens to you, there is always a different way to see things. The truth is bad things happen to good people.  Every human on this planet has endured at least one crisis, and many people, more than a few of them.

You may not deserve one bad thing to happen to you, but things do happen, and what happens – happens!  The only choice you have is to broaden your perspective, and focus on learning from the incidents, and moving forward.

You may find that years down the road, your life changed for the better because of a specific past trauma.  Your character has been honed and your wisdom too.

If you succumb to today’s trials you’re done!  Even if you haven’t been able to find, to date, the “good” from the past you’ve endured, you will recognize it when it is time.

Don’t give up. Don’t give in!  When something triggers potential negatively charged emotions, take a breath!  If you are new to “the magic”, prior posts tell you how to begin to breathe and manage different stresses in your life.

What you “feel” about circumstances evolve into your life.  The power of thought, when rightly directed, is the key to it all. You will draw all the injury, all the anger, and all the fear to you like a magnet.

Likewise, if you think forgiveness, love, appreciation and hope,

you will draw all the joy and positive thoughts from the world to you.  This will trigger a pattern of blossoming in you.

Negative or positive thoughts, they are probably sparked with the same triggers, simply different interpretations.

Right thought holds the key to every situation. Be regenerated and transformed by your thoughts.  Today is the day.

Choose to create your reality.

The benefits we experience when pets are in close proximity to us are really not recognized fully by most of us.  There is a powerful human-animal connection that is only now being fully recognized.

There have been many workshops held on the benefits of owning pets.  There were just a few scientific papers available on the subject a few years ago, though snow studies have revealed that pets boost survival rates for coronary care unit patients. That was an eye-opening finding.

People have known the healing effect for centuries, but recently new data on the role of chemistry in the relationship has been revealed.

When a person interacts with a pet, the central nervous system releases several hormones that cause feelings of pleasure.  One hormone in particular, oxytocin, seems to play a major role in reinforcing this bond.

The hormone creates a sense of warmth, nurturing and calm.  Simply petting dogs releases the same chemical in both humans and the animals!  Researchers know this with certainty, but are not clear as to how two species can produce feelings of peace, closeness and contentment in each other.

What is clear is the fact that this bonding is very helpful in managing stress of almost any kind.

Animals (particularly dogs) give unconditional love.  It doesn’t matter if the owner yells, or is unkempt, or even doesn’t offer the best care to the animal.  All the animal wants is love and approval by their owner.  They accept their owners and companions without qualification.  An animal’s acceptance

is nonjudgmental and forgiving. They don’t play psychological games people sometimes play.  They accept you the way you are.

Pet ownership particularly helps children to learn to read body language.  The experiences children have with their pets later develop into relationships with people, and actually helps develop more empathy for others.

Children who are fortunate to have a pet learn nurturing skills, and the responsibilities that come with it. They also have in store for them lots of fun to share with a new pet.

Over eons it is well established that touch is very important for the nourishment for our spirits and minds.  Sometimes people who have been neglected find it difficult to accept touch from other humans.  The relationship with animals, simply the act of petting a dog, can create feelings of security and warmth; feelings of love without demands humans often desire.

In cases like these, having an animal to hold, hug, and touch can make a world of difference to people who would otherwise have no positive, appropriate physical contact.

Astounding cases of pet heroism and loving acts prove that the interaction between pets and humans, even just passing contacts, are healing and worthy of categorizing as important relationships in the management of stress.

Find ot for yourself and consider, if you don’t own a pet, possibly adopting one for yourself and your family.  More fun and less expensive than therapy, pet ownership can truly be a healing factor in your life.

When was the last time you actually thought about the breathing process?  Have you ever?

For many of you this will be reviewing material that warrants a regular review.  For some this will be NEW and IMPORTANT information that can really help your stress level when activated.

Isn’t it amazing that this involuntary process of breathing, one that gives us a FREE commodity, one we take for granted, can be refined and used to radically improve the quality of every moment of our human lives.

By cultivating your ability to improve the quality of your oxygen you’ll actually see these things happening to the body.  Your level of energy will increase, the quality of sleep will improve, and your muscles, tendons and ligaments, in times of stress, will relax easier.

You can create morphine like painkillers from within you.  You can lower your blood pressure, slow your heart rate, control the flow of hydrochloric acid and adrenalin, and even create endorphins that are similar to an opiate like high.  “Get high” naturally.  Additionally, beta-endorphins also kick in when you walk or exercise, because of premium breathing.  Do something that is good for your body.

You may think it’s too simple and ask why isn’t there more promotion of the benefits of using oxygen optimally.  Simply, as yet, the “prescription” of oxygen for you hasn’t been necessary (with exceptions such as inhalants for asthmatics or COPD patients).  No one can market the oxygen you can freely use.  No one profits from breathing the air all around you, EXCEPT YOU. You don’t have to ask permission to obtain the healing powers of this wonderful gift for your oxygen machine.

The idea is that mindful breathing techniques will get enough oxygen to all the hidden and infinite areas of the only place you have to live – your body.

What else can you expect when you tend to your oxygen garden?  Your breathing will become easier, because the muscles in your chest will be stronger.  Your air will flow in and out more rapidly and with less effort.

The tiring work you do will be easier as the more mindful oxygen you take in, the more energy you produce.  You oxygen will distribute rapidly from your lungs to your heart and to all parts of your body.

Your heart will beat strong and will pump more blood with each stroke.  Even when you are working your hardest, you heart will pump blood at a lower rate than if you were “de-conditioned”.

You will increase the number and size of the blood vessels that transport blood to your body tissue, thus enriching that tissue and increasing circulation.

Cultivating this oxygen will pay off not only with better health for your body, but the quality of your oxygen intake is the basis of dynamic and creative intellectual activity.  Intelligence and skill function will always peak with increased intake of oxygen.  Your brain actually requires fifty percent more oxygen than the rest of the body to think optimally.

This is the physiology of your body.  If you work on getting in the habit of breathing deeply and exhaling fully, all these things will automatically happen.  How cool is that!

Think about your oxygen and take in a few mindful plugs of right now, exhaling fully and deeply. It’s  a wonderful thing to do for your life!