Tag Archives: stress

Got no clue of where to go from here? Then just read this short post for fun

If you cannot do what you used to do – do what you can.

A good cry washes the eyes and lets loose of sorrow withheld, to begin anew.

If you want to see trust – look in the eyes of your dog.

You cannot heal if you refuse to think you will.

Never listen to words from a man with a heart of stone.

Remember God, and He will remember you.

Stop long enough to say hello to the person standing next to you in line.  You may see an unexpected smile.

A sincere “thank you” is a gift worth more than gold to the receiver.

Did you see the full moon?  Why not?  How many do you have left in your lifetime?

A good memory needs reviewing on occasion..  A bad one should be dismissed – if the lesson was learned.

Begin to see the series of things that happen in your life not as burdens, but as challenges.

For every kind word you speak to an elderly person, your heart enlarges, and your place in eternity is more certain.

Love children, even if they are dirty and have a runny nose, and are not yours.  They are newcomers to this planet and they learn what they see and hear.  They belong to all of us.

Remember we are all human beings, all flawed, and all overburdened in one way or another. Join together as if someone is invading our homes, as if war is imminent, clasp spirits, and then pray for peace, hand to hand and heart to heart.  We are human.  We are earthlings, here to be a family, to protect the planet, and to forgive, and love one another.

Now stretch your arms up, take a breath, and smile.  CREATE a day worth living!

Always find a way to laugh and be happy.  That’s my plan, and I’m sticking to it!

 

 

 

 

What do you think?

Every thought is a seed planted in your mind.  In the mind of us all our thoughts can be cultivated.

If you think, “I know this will be a good day because I will find at least two wonderful things about it” – it will happen!  Likewise, the other direction too; but why even suggest the negative thoughts, as they are in mass all around us.

Nothing is more powerful than YOU, because YOU are the ONLY ONE who can THINK in your mind!

I must reiterate, though, my faith in God – commonly thought of as the “unseen God”.

I see God all around me in the color of the flowers, the breath of the breeze, the laugh of a child, the singing of the little bird that sits outside my window, and in my capacity to THINK, CHOOSE, and LOVE.

I do not chide those who are not familiar with faith, because we are all children “in process” on this planet.  We all learn at our own pace, and we are given the power to make our own choices.  I am no judge of any man.

As we drift back to cultivating thoughts, I believe I will plan my day.  I have no control over most things, but my attitude is one thing I can command.  Today is bursting with demanding paperwork I must work to complete.  I am on a time schedule and so many of the terms in what I am doing are rather unfamiliar to me.

So here is a seed I will plant.  I am going to tackle my work as best I can.  If I get stuck, I may take a break and get a drink of water, or simply stand up and stretch.  I will stop and use my oxygen to think optimally and stretch my neck and fingers and then get back to the task at hand – refreshed.

I always use my oxygen as a secret weapon – and it is.  When stress enters, so does shallow breathing.  You begin to cut off your oxygen supply to your brain, which needs fifty percent more to function optimally!  So breathe!

I plant the seed knowing I will have to stop to take care of other demands that must be met, and I will do it happily, and consider those times refreshing moments to move.

I will end the day stretching as I stand, pat myself on the back for doing what I can, and plan on a quiet evening with my husband, asking how his day was…it will be a great day.

Those are my seeds.  What will you plant for just this day?

Here is a secret.  I already said a prayer and stretched a bit this morning, and I decided to have coffee and write this post.  I love to write, and because I took this time I will start my other “challenges” with a good attitude, having already done something that I love, and something that heads me in the right direction for a WONDERFUL DAY.

CREATE your life-moment by moment.  Get rid of bad seeds and plant only the good ones.  You will be happy you did.  You can handle anything if you just believe you can!

NOT a post regarding NOT drinking alcohol!

This is a post to just say – I know there are plenty of you out there who are able to enjoy a drink or two, and not loose your wits about you, or get drunk!  That is PERFECTLY fine in my humble opinion.

The post last week was just to alert some people who may be unaware of a pending or current problem.  I would not be me if I did not attend to some “stress management” techniques honestly – the upside and the down fal – so to speak!

Hope you had a fantastic weekend!  I really enjoyed just an exceptionally beautiful day.

Sometimes I feel kind of guilty because the weather in this town is lovely most of the time.  My heartfelt prayers go to those who are in terrible scenarios because of the winter weather.

Be careful on the road, and don’t drink and drive (hhaaaahaaa, just had to add that!)

Let’s get on to a bit of stress management magic.  Working with the public can be stressful just because all of us are not able to be happy and relaxed, all of the time.  So it does take practice and finesse to “handle” situations effectively.

We all have a secret weapon within us.  It can be called upon and used no matter what the situation may be.  It is the use of our oxygen.

If you are a person familiar with yoga or lamaze breathing, you have a bit of a head start.

Even though oxgyen is something we take for granted, because we need not think about breathing, and it just happens, our oxygen can be used to refine our “people skills.”

Say you have a nasty customer screaming in your face about something.  You know you have to handle it with decorum, yet you would really like to double up your fist and punch them right in the pie hole!  How do you begin to respond?

First exercise – use your intellect.

  1. Take a deep breath slowly, knowing that moment will allow you to respond more effectively. When we feel stress, our breathing slows and we don’t get a good amount of oxygen to use our brains.  Our muscles begin to tighten up, and our response may fly out of our mouths without much thought behind the words.
  2. Speak calmly and actually with a lower voice than you might normally use.  Yelling back only excalates.  The client will have to be calmer in order to hear you.  By taking a couple of breaths before speaking you will have a chance to let them calm down and reply with words of your choice, not reaction words.
  3. Suggest there must be a way to resolve the dilema, even if you don’t know how right at the moment.
  4. Then proceed calmly, taking charge of what could have been a scenario that was out of control.

It sounds too simple, I know.  You may think some situations cannot be handled this way, but in all the years I have known about this secret weapon, I have NEVER come across a circumstance that I could not handle effectively.  This is honest!  Pretty high record, eh?

I also pray.  Prayer is my most powerful ally, even if I don’t always SEEM to get the answer I wanted!

So there it is, and IT WORKS!  You can learn to use your oxygen to be your secret weapon.  If it sounds too simple, to silly (perhaps), really think about it.

When you get oxygen to the brain (which requires fifty percent more than the rest of the body to function optimally), you will respond more effectively.  You will keep your neck and shoulders from tightening up and causing yourself unnecessary pain.  You will have more relaxed energy.  There are many other benefits.

Think about it.  Your oxygen is something you cannot live for long without it.  You can refine it and learn to use it in way you never dreamed.  Why not?

Think about it.  Would it be bettter to slow your breathing because of stress, or make your breathing your secret weapon?  It is always with you, and it is free.

Have an outstanding day.  You might as well take a few mindful plugs of oxygen when you finish this post.  CREATE it.

PAIN IS NOT THE BOSS!

Are you having a bad pain day?  Physically?  Mentally?

Join the crowd.  Believe it or not, it is RARE for any human being to make it through a week without some kind of “pain”.

PAIN:  physical or mental suffering or discomfort.  Agony, torture, ache, throb, sting, torment, hurt, twinge. Bother, effort, sadden, grieve, distress, perturb, oppress, and more…..

Whether used as a noun or a verb, pain is a word we are all too familiar with, and that is for certain.

“Is there any way to get rid of pain?” you might ask.  The answer is not a simple yes or no.  I wish it were, as it would make everyone’s lives so much easier to live.

Here is the answer we all want to hear:  YES, some pain will go away.  For instance, if you twist your ankle – within time and the right treatment and the pain will go away.  There are many instances in which pain will diminish and disappear.

Now, here is the harsh truth no one wants to hear:  some pain will never go away.  The physical pain of a wound or injury can dissipate with healing.  Down the road,  however, our human body “may” suffer residual effects from injuries early in your life.  Arthritis may affect you as you reach retirement age.  There is no guarantee either way.  You may suffer pangs of memory of the earlier injuries or wound with a weakness – or you may not!

That’s life!  No guarantees!

As far as pain from a divorce, or the pain from the agony of a bad breakup or sadness of the loss of someone you love, AGAIN, there are no guarantees how long you will suffer mentally from those incidents.

So what is the point of this post?  I can tell you from A VAST ARRAY OF BOTH PHYSICAL AND MENTAL over a lifetime, there are ways to put pain on a back burner and not on a pedestal!

USE YOUR BRAINS!  Switch from the emotion of pain to your intellect!  As I have said to a few people when they asked how I have handled all that has happened to me, I just tell them ‘I AM MENTAL!”  I am.

Not unstable, not crazy (except in a good way), but mental in the way that I learned long ago to switch from emotion to intellect, and THEN REACT to your pain.  Emotion sometimes makes us hang on to feelings that should be long gone.  And, I know from personal experience, that we humans are MUCH STRONGER and MORE CAPABLE than we usually give ourselves credit for; perhaps in some people,  it is just not knowing how much we can handle.

I am only able to spend a bit more time on this post today, but as a beginning, here are some tips to handle mental and physical pain.

1.  Use your oxygen.  When we feel any pain it is a natural response to slow or stop good breathing.  We cut off our oxygen supply that is needed to be intelligent and make the best choices.  Breathing can be your secret weapon.  If its good enough to help women through childbirth (and I’ve had three children), it surely is good enough to help all of us begin to be in charge of our PAIN.

2.  Do not believe what anybody tells you about how your pain will be terrible and forever. That is BS.  Do not be overwhelmed by anyone else’s opinion, even the “practicing physician”.

  1. Think in terms of” I can and I will” whatever – when we think we create brain cell impressions and we actually begin a path of becoming wheoever we think we are!
  2. Be realistic.  I KNOW without a doubt that I have to deal with some residual effects of a major surgery that had last May.  It is a LONG story, but because of some really careless and negligent health “professionals” I believe nerve roots were killed, and not just damaged.  Therein, I must learn to live with some changes that absolutely drove me nuts at first.  I must also live with some pain.  I have accepted it, and am moving onward and upward.

No body says it is easy to use your wits instead of falling on your emotions, but it is easier than you may think.  We are creatures of habit.  If you get into the habit of thinking and living certain ways, you can REALLY improve the quality of your life.  It may be a challenge at first, but we humans are way stronger than we can even imagine.  We are made to survive!

I do have to close to begin dinner for my hubby, but lastly I need to mention, if you believe in God, believe in the power that is available to you through prayer.  That is my greatest defender and healer.  If you don’t believe in God, then for goodness sake, say a pray to heal anyway once in a while.  It can’t hurt – right?

CREATE your life.  Create your healing.  It can be done!  Just keep thinking that you are “mental” – in a good way!  If you ever want to know my “challenges” to see where I am coming from, let me knowm and I will share at sometime.  But what is important now is HEAL, BABY, HEAL!  For yourself, for your family, and because life is just lots more fun when you are the captain of your ship.

 

 

 

 

Walking on Eggshells?

Walking on Eggshells-You’ve Probably heard this before:

“The idiom walking on eggshells generally describes a situation in which people must tread lightly around a sensitive topic, or make every effort not to offend a volatile or hypersensitive person. Literally walking on the empty shells of eggs would require exceptional caution and self-control, similar to the feeling of avoiding conflict with an easily disturbed friend, relative or employer. Family members of active alcoholics or ragea-aholics often use this phrase to describe their careful avoidance of conflict with their loved one. The origin of the idiom is a matter of dispute, but the general consensus is that walking on eggshells came from the same place as other cautionary actions, such as walking on thin ice or broken glass. Some sources suggest that it came from an earlier idiom, “walking on eggs.” While walking on eggshells presents enough difficulty for most people, walking on the whole egg without damage would be nearly impossible. Certain politicians who took extraordinarily cautious positions on an issue were said to have the dubious ability to walk on eggs without breaking them.”                     (Excerpts from Wise Geek)

 

So there is the definition.  The way I have always heard it used is when someone is in an abusive relationship and they dodge a bullet, or an angry person, by‘walking on eggshells”.  Treading lightly, so to speak, for fear of a reprisal, whether verbal or physical.  I know many moms who back down from an angry partner for the “sake” of the children, or fear of harm from their own husband or partner.

If you have found yourself cowering, or bending over backwards to take care not to anger a sleeping giant, here is my advice.  GET HELP!  Get it now before it is too late.  If you cannot get help – at least get the hell out of the way!  I know it sounds easier than it is, but if there is that fear within you of “danger”, there should also be the word SURVIVAL come to mind.

This is not a joke, sadly.  Our culture is geared at such a fast pace right now, and the stress levels of those who are in the position of earning money – to survive – is right at the breaking point.

No matter what the media reports, things are not improving for the peasants.  Anyone who is less than he / or she needs, feels the pinch.  Last month our house payment went up eighty dollars, our utility bill was up fifty; food and other goods have steadily been rising over the past three or four years.  All the “jobs” that are reported were the holiday part-time jobs that have no benefits, and only lasted until after the “shopping season” ended.

Pressure all around, with “no vents” like a pressure cooker.  In the final act of that scene, everything blows.  SO STAY ON YOUR TOES LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

Remember you are the only person who can SAVE YOU!  I pray and have great faith in God, so in that sense, my life is easier than some.  When I pray, I believe the burden is lifted and handed to God, and to show my faith, I find some relaxation in the scenarios.

For those of you who believe – do pray.  Then think about your situation and if there need be changes for your safety, or the safety of your children – begin to organize a withdrawal from danger for your family.

If you do not pray, you still must evaluate the situation you are in currently, and if there are red flags for danger, begin to make an exit plan.  If you BELIEVE with all your heart that counseling or communication can literally help, by all means, initiate it.  You always have the option in the future, if times worsen, to make changes.  Just be sure NOT to place you or your children in a volatile situation.

For those who are unemployed (either short term, or long term), those who have addictions to alcohol or drugs, those who have anger management issues, the “times” are very trying.

It is fine to take these things into consideration if you opt to try to work things out.  HOWEVER, be aware if the communication stops, if there is no attempt to correct change the “danger zone” – it is time to make a change!

God bless you and those you are trying to protect from an impossible situation.  YOU have to evaluate and take steps forward soon.  YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!  DO NOT BE IN DENIAL OR YOU MAY WIND UP A STATISTIC!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

WHEN LIFE HANDS YOU A PILE OF DIRT VIA A HARDBALL IN THE FACE….

Just think how important you are that you are offered challenges of a lifetime!Does that sound strange?  Maybe so, but I have had my face covered in dirt, and delivered like a hardball slamming into my face with might and a sting.Guess what?  I am still here.For eight months I have been dealing with recovering from a burst compression fracture and major surgery-one that only happened because of the neglect of two physicians, and two physicians and two neurosurgeons.

On top of it, just before this travesty I was supposed to have two individual total hip replacements ( they will only operate on one at a time), as my hips are bone to bone.  Because of the fusion of my back I have been unable to have that done, and I am barely walking around at the moment. I actually called my doctor to get a wheelchair (and wrote her a note) three days ago.  Told her I needed it asap.  Nothing!Just as a perfect finish (I hope) to these challenges, I found two days ago I needed to have a tooth, one of my “chewers” removed.  Had a serious swelling and it was necessary.  Oh drat, I just finished paying fiftenn hundred dollars to have a root canal and a cap on that very tooth!  To have it removed was only a thousand cash, and in return I am minus a tooth and have a very swollen and painful face.Photo 1

This is me with a towel and an ice pack.  You wouldn’t want to see the swelling.

Right now I am laying down to rest.  Writing is a good part of my sanity.  What are the (must be) multiple stress management tricks to keep my wits about me.  There could be a sub-list under the major stress management technique, but basically to manage ANY traumas or scenarios, you must FIRST manage your response!  Life really is in charge of us, but one thing we have control of one hundred percent is our ATTITUDE, and therein, our RESPONSE to life.  WE HAVE A CHOICE.  We always have the choice to make the best of things, or throw in the towel.I am not much at throwing towels – no giving up!  Granted, I am fortunate to believe in God and His being there for me, during the good and the bad times.  I am fortunate enough to NOT blame God, but to realize life is what it is.  We may never know the “why” of things, but we must always realize, we still have one hundred percent control of how to accept and respond to any challenge. I also know I have an edge as I have been teaching stress management for years and really believe in the powers we have been given.  I TRIED BEING MISERABLE!

IT SUCKED, SO I GAVE IT UP!  Literally.

It may take you time to develop the habit of controlling your attitude in response to life, but I guarantee you that if you can change this one habit from a negative attitude, to a positive attitude, YOUR LIFE WILL CHANGE IN WAYS YOU NEVER DREAMED –  IN YOUR WILDEST DREAMS.Think about it seriously.  It’s not always a piece of cake, but you always have the choice to take that scenario and turn it into something you can at least, handle! CREATE a beautiful life. YOU ARE WORTH IT. I off to do my best at whatever comes next.