Stress Management Magic

Provider, father, friend, husband or partner -are just a few of the demands made on men today.

Men, you  have a world of demands this life puts upon you every day too!  There is no doubt about that.  Today’s economy has played hell with hard working middle class men.

It has touched all levels of income, but for the average American, is proving to be fatal (for some), and for others , debilitating temporarily.  There is a quiet strength and regenerating ability within men, often lost in the shuffle of providing the almighty dollar, but it is there.

For the blue-collar  (another catch phrase) workers, the times have never been as difficult since the Great Depression.  The white-collar worker has been designated to be office workers, professionals, managerial, and administrative positions.  Many of those workers typically wear shirts with white collars.

Those working in factories or doing any type of manual labor are dubbed blue-collar workers, as when this catch phrase was born, they wore blue collars (at least they were in past days).

With two million people out of work currently, men are dealing with, not only being the wage earners, but many have been laid off and are now trying to figure out how to survive.

So, men, take a breath!  It has never been more important for you to learn something so readily available, and so lifesaving.

When you are ready to blow a gasket and shoot arrows at someone who may NOT really be the target – TAKE A BREATH!

You body will respond by calming down and getting enough oxygen to the brain to think and respond rather than blowup and react.  Please if you haven’t used your oxygen in a mindful way – learn now.  It might save your job, your marriage, or any number of relationships.  THIS IS THE WAY YOUR OXYGEN MACHINE WORKS.

These are stressful times.  Now is the time you need to use your oxygen for your oxygen machine.  Realize, too, that no matter how bleak things look right now, the old saying “this too shall pass” is correct.

For those who have been laid off work keep in mind this has nothing to do with you.  It has to do with the money god and those people in charge.  Life is so not fair right now, but here is a tip about women that might help.

If you handle your “life” as it is, with a calmer demeanor and more positive hopeful thoughts, your woman will almost always stand with you and hope for better times.  Though most of the world feel American women are spoiled, I have known many women over the years that would deal with sacrificing material possessions if necessary, without a whimper, if their man is willing to talk about problems.  Be gentle with your children as they are the innocents – no matter how irritating you may feel when you are tired and down.

Don’t give up, and don’t quit looking, as you never know what may be just around the corner.  Hope will show on your face.  Keep in mind that you can only do the best that you can do, and accept it.  If you have to suck it up and take less money, or tighten the budget strings, talk with your partner, there are ways to do this with less sting if you work together.

Don’t fall into the “bottle” or increase your smoking because of these hard times.  These things will only exacerbate the problems. Use your oxygen.

You’ve done nothing wrong and no one is questioning your   manhood, that is not in question, but if you give up hope, your future will look much bleaker and hard times will increase.

So chin up, and load up on the “free” stuff – your oxygen supply.  When stress enters humans become shallow breathers, thereby cutting off oxygen to the body and mind when it is needed the most.

Inhale slowly through the nose.  Pull in a positive thought such as “it will be okay”.  Exhale through the mouth and push out negativity-watch it, in your mind flying out your mouth and into oblivion.

Do this whenever you feel you are edging towards panic or out of control stress.

STRESS MILLIONS ARE EXPERIENCING RIGHT NOW!

There are unexpected horror stories happening right now because of the high unemployment rate in our nation.  In February alone the number of job losses (reported) is over thirty-five thousand.  It is disheartening, to say the least, to be unemployed and not be able to support yourself or a family. This is particularly true for families with children, or with only one member of the family in the work force.

Not only is it stressful because of the financial problems that are accruing, it is devastating to many relationships. Today there are many citizens who have worked all their lives and have now been unemployed, not by choice, for months.  There are a growing number of people who have also just given up, and that number isn’t even counted in the unemployment monthly figures.

After a few months of unemployment there rises a feeling of detachment to the work force. As the period of time extends   the less current the resume becomes, and the potential for a possible loss of skills can occur.

For the unemployed person there is added worry about how the bills will be paid, often boredom with too much free time, a hit to the ego, and the ever-present luring nature of having a drink to “take off the edge”. The seductive nature of alcohol is a real temptation (after all it is social and legal).  It is also easy to have a second drink because “the first one made you feel so good”. Then you think, ” perhaps another just to be social”. The ball is rolling now.

Be careful, alcohol can run you down and kill your relationships, family, and even the potential to ever work again.  Motivation is lacking with those who drink regularly – except the motivation to get another drink. Good men (and women) can get caught up in this downward spiral.  It happens all the time!

Alcohol is a VERY DANGEROUS drug. Like any drug, it has a cumulative draw.  Too much alcohol and lies are congruent.  If a person has a blackout there is a huge danger of total ruination, because of actions you can’t remember, the possibility of driving under the influence, and often times, violence.

You don’t want the unemployed person, or yourself, to have to drink and get into that “fake world” where everyone is your best friend, and you all tell each other how great you are, just to regain some confidence.  That doesn’t even take into consideration the cost of the alcohol.  These days two drinks is the same cost as if you went to the store and bought a bottle!

These truths aren’t meant to freak anyone out, but to simply elevate awareness of potential problems.  We are ALL FLAWED human beings the need to be cognizant of the pitfalls and dangers that face so many people are real. It is important for you to be on your toes if “things” seem to be changing.

Be supportive and do understand it’s tough right now.  It does not help in most situations to point out how many other people are in similar situations.  A person who has been gainfully employed can only stay home so long (particularly with children) before “stir crazy” and “cabin fever” manifest.

Remember, too, particularly a man, may not want to share his insecurity, his concern, or his feelings of failure.  As an example of how tough it is right now, there are fifty-one candidates for every one position available in construction!  That is staggering.

If you have a genetic connection to alcohol someone with alcoholic tendencies, be aware. Also, for those who simply fall into the pit by circumstance, keep the risks in mind. They are real.

So what can you really do?

1.  The first key to stress management will always be learning to use your oxygen to calm yourself down.  You will not “react” but “respond” with intellect if you slow down to breathe.  When you concentrate on your breath you will be leaving your problems for a short time.  You can only think of one thing at a time.

2.  If you are the person unemployed, listen to your mate or partner.  Really listen.  Some things they say may seem unfair to you, but be mature enough to know what is true, and work on the problems.

3.  If you are the mate or partner of the person unemployed, be patient.  Share your feelings without tearing down the other person.  Use your intellect and recognize the difference between someone who is really trying, and someone who is not.

3.  Remember fighting will not resolve anything.  It will only exacerbate the problem.  Again, use your oxygen before opening your mouth!  Don’t yell.  Everyone concerned is frustrated.

4.  Have a “production” meeting and make notes as to possible job opportunities or alternate choices that may work.

5.  STAY FLEXIBLE.  There are no guarantees of what will happen in the next moment.  The only guarantee you have is that if you turn sour or negative, you will definitely ruin your